mcculs's blog

The river was running too fast.

If 8 out of 10 Vermont teens don't smoke, and that means 2 out of 10 must do, and I have 10 friends, 2 must smoke then. If they don't then another group of 10 must have 4 friends that do. What about a group where all 10 smokes, does that means 5 groups don't? What happens when we make it so no Vermont teens smoke? What will we do with the statistics? What about all the magnets they've given out in school?

"Backpack? Pencils? Shoes? Dress pants? Binders???" All too true as I'm reaminded of the place I will be in three days while being wheeled through Target with my mother in tow, blasting out random spurts of remembrence of the items I've forgotten to get myself.

Ok, we're lost"
"No we're not! We're temporarily misplaced!"
"What?!"
"Temporarily misplaced, not lost"
"WHAT?!!"
"A. stop yelling B. we are temporarily misplaced"
"Not lost?"
"Yup!"
"Only one thing to say to this...."
"Yes..."
"You are a..."
"Genius?"
"MORAN"
*completely unaware* "Thank y..what?"
"You are a moron"
"There's the turn!!"
"No its not!!!"
"Yes it is!!!!"
"NO! I thought we were lost, excuse me, temporarily misplaced!!"
"We were! Now I know where we are! Turn!"
"No!" *turns to face passenger*
"FACE THE ROAD!!!!"
"Jeez, ok ok ok" *faces road again*
"Ok, thank you. Turn! Now!"
"No alright, it’s not the turn!!!"
"You missed it! You missed the turn! Turn around!"
"No freakin' way!"
"Yes! Turn!"
"No!" *keeps driving*
"Give me the wheel!!!" *lunges for the wheel*
"Get the f*** off me!"
"TURN AROUND"
"GET THE F*** OFF ME!!"
"TURN AROUND!!!!!"
*both scream as car goes off road into a field of grass*
"You should have turned"
"F*** you"

I'm sorry I let you down
Well, not really
I was the worst player
I'm sorry I'm not playing
Well, not really
3 hours everyday?!?
I'm sorry I injured my shoulder
Well, not really
It opened up new options since I can't play
Oh well,
I'm more sorry for myself than you
'Cause really?
I'm easy to replace
Just pick another person to play defence
I'm going to keep playing
Just not for you
So, I'm sorry
Well, not really

"You'll never be perfect" the girl says. "Look at you," she continues "Your style sucks, your hair.." she stops and cackles "That's its own work. Were you trying out for Young Frankenstein?" she laughs while the girl sinks lower. "You're clothes," she begins "Hmmm, raid your brother's closet again?" She laughs harder as the girl falls. "What's this? On the ground? You really are a weakling" She laughs harder and harder until she can no longer breathe. "God girl, you make me laugh! I don't know how you live with yourself. Day in and day out waking to find you're no better than yesterday. All day you walk through the world knowing that everyone hates you and what everyone say is that you're a.." She's cut off as the mirror falls to the ground and breaks.

How far is too far?

How couldn't you see something coming?
Even when its right in front of you
How can't you hear the sound?
Even though its crying in front of you
Why don't you know what's happening?
Even though you're the one who caused it

As we headed up to shower after swimming, it began to rain. Emily, the counselor, smiled. She walked straight into a puddle and began to splash. The campers and I watched. Then, slowly they began to join. Liz, the other counselor, took some of the dry girls up to the shower house leaving me and Emily with six of the twelve girls. Mud and water flew in the air as they went puddle jumping. Suddenly, Emily peeled off from the group and ran into a mini lake forming by the flagpole. The girls, following her example, took off and slid into the giant puddle. I slowly followed them as the girls had their fun. Then, I slipped and fell hard on my behind into the cold, muddy mess. I smiled, stood up, and ran straight through the muddy grass. The girls laughed as water began being kicked into the air. I saw Erica with her group passing. Erica laughed as I slid through the grass into the puddle.She seemed to be enjoying watching a fellow CIT slid through puddles.

I'm unaware of the world
All I see,
Random people surrounding me and my world
I watch the world go by from my park bench
I watch people pass and go
I see children run and scream as their small feet carry them through the park
As the sun fades people escape from this world and enter another but I don't leave
The pool closes; the gate shuts as I sit there
I must leave my world
I climb onto my bike and head to my other world, my home

I wish I had a do over
Could live this day twice
Could redo my mistakes,
Oh, I wish I had a do over

I running with no purpose,
Everyone I pass just stares,
Like: "Who's the girl running?"
And: "Does she now how late it is?"
No one cares to ask,
All they know is,
There's a girl running through the street
Her dyed red hair is fighting its way out of her hair tie
Her left shoe is loose and almost off
Strangers stop and look behind me,
They expect an ax murderer
Or someone chasing me
But no,
I'm just running with no purpose

Start everyday,
Same as any other,
Just the same morning routine.
One day, one heart
One belief, one start
One hope answered
One day, today
That's all, anyway
And never again
Never again,
Will this happen
Never, never!
It won't
I can see, never
Will it be the same
Same old,
Repeat,
The world's on repeat
I won't redo this day
I never will, anyway
Of course not, I stand
I refuse to get caught, caught in the cycle
I won't do it, never again
Never again will I see that face,
Staring back at me, in the mirror
The mirror, fogged over so,
All I can see is distorted faces
Staring at me,
Looking into my eyes
That's all I can see
Never will I,
Get caught in the roundabout,
Never can I,
Get stuck in the past,
I must move on
I will move on
I can move on
Oh yes I will, move on

Believe it, or not
Try, or not
Do it again! Or not
Why do you never believe,
Try
Or do anything?!
Or not
~Shannon

"You look like a six-year old!" she snaps
"So?" I responded
"You look like an idiot!" she tries again
"So?" I respond again
"I've heard better comebacks from a baloney sandwich"
"Now that sad," I say "Talking to inanimate objects"
She rolls her eyes and struts off
"So immature"
Well, that's what you get,
From a fourteen-year old,
With Hello Kitty sitting on her head
~Shannon