4linz.lu's blog

not everyone's crazy

insane in the brain

crying out

help, save my soul

don't you think it's gotten old

we get it

got it

good

we accept it

the pain

the sorrow

who cares, whatever, it's a mask of tears

she wears so she doesn't

have to face her fears

that maybe the real monster

is inside

we all try to hide

from our own sorry

quick-to-bite minds

we're all just sleeping

hoping we'll never wake up

don't you get it

we've all given up

no ones living

just breathing

and walking in line

don't cry

I just realized it too

we're all out of our minds.

As loud as a cricket

As sweet as a sugar cube

As pretty as a flower

As shocking as lightning

As gentle as a dancer

As loved as a kitten

As lonely as a tear

As brilliant as the sun

As tragic as Marilyn Monroe

A wise man once told me

nothing

because wise men don't choose to talk to me very often.

My life is not hard enough

for me to triumph above it.

My life is not grand enough

to allow me to sit back with satisfaction.

I am not shy enough

for my silence to scream out into the busy room.

But I am not loud enough

for people to notice my voice.

I do not possess

any great talents

or really any talents at all. Read more »

Sometimes the thing we need

is to not

need anything at all

the relentless pull for somthing

more in our

lives

drags

us

down

into a land that no man

can ever

escape for it is our

minds

that hold us captive

and keep us enslaved

to our own

pathetic

lives

tell me

why wishes dont come true

and

the day is as gray

as the never ending

dusk Read more »

       With every pitter patter of water droplets plinking on the metal roof the anticipation swells. It swells so fast it filters through the cracks in the walls and the spaces under the doors with the sudden chill that has entered the air. The thunder starts so quietly you don’t even know it’s thunder; it’s only a quiet bass drum to accent to tink tink tink of the rain and the whistle of the air. Read more »

I'm kneeling
behind home plate
hidden behind my armor
waiting
for the next pitch
to hurtle towards me.
My heart pounds
at a steady beat
and my breath
goes in and out
in and out.
I'm nervous
that I'm not going
to catch the ball
or that
the runner on third
will steal home
and I will be too slow
to get her out.
Suddenly,
I see the pitcher winding up
and I quickly draw
my breath
the ball flies from her hand
it soars to me
the batter swings,
misses,
and the ball
smacks
into my open glove
and stays there.
Success.

In class
I witness the sneakiest acts of intolerance
you will ever see.
Never
is it obvious why
the new kid is so quickly rejected
or why
the girl who makes too many jokes
is laughed at
for all the wrong reasons.
It's all a silent war
between who we are
and who we think everyone else is.
There are unspoken rules
about how you can be.
You must be different
and yet be the same as everybody else.
You must be so perfect
that you aren't really perfect at all.
You must submit to the crowd
or be pushed aside.
It's your choice
whether to be in or not. Read more »

I hadn't been walking long
down the dusty gravel road.
The streets were lined with vendors
selling everything
from pottery to exotic vegetables.
People bustled about
chatting, gossiping, and haggling
with the merchants.
I didn't have much time
to stop and look at anything.
My parents would be expecting me soon.
I promised myself I would resist
the tugging temptation
urging me to stop walking
and look a while at the fabulous goods
that the people had to offer.
"Just one stop couldn't hurt"
I told myself.
I gave in to the pull
and veered off my path.
I was standing Read more »

I am in the elevator,
slouching against the wall
in the corner.
Sometimes,
I really like to just stand there
feeling the rise and fall
as it goes up and down.
People come and go.
They never stay long.
I can usually count
on a few expressionless business people
to pass through.
And sometimes
I see a handful of kids
with their mother.
Every once in a while one is crying
and I can't help but wonder why.
I often like to look at the people
who stop by
and make up stories about their lives.
I wonder if the dull lady in beige
was once a cheerful girl
who liked to play soccer. Read more »

I am in the elevator,
slouching against the wall
in the corner.
Sometimes,
I really like to just stand there
feeling the rise and fall
as it goes up and down.
People come and go.
They never stay long.
I can usually count
on a few expressionless business people
to pass through.
And sometimes
I see a handful of kids
with their mother.
Every once in a while one is crying
and I can't help but wonder why.
I often like to look at the people
who stop by
and make up stories about their lives.
I wonder if the dull lady in beige
was once a cheerful girl
who liked to play soccer. Read more »

I walk out of the sweaty gym where most of the 7th and 8th graders are dancing in hustling packs. I need a three second break from the flashing strobe lights and the pounding music. The hallway is surprisingly quiet in comparison, and there are small circular tables lining the sides with slightly eerie blue lights hanging above them. At first glance I think the hallway is empty, but soon I realize that is very wrong. Around each small table is a group of friends slumped into the shadows. They are all hugging some crying person, or consoling a whimpering friend. Read more »

some days
you look at me
and smile
and I'll say something
not really funny
and you'll laugh anyway
and say something back
but other days
you don't notice me
as if
I fade into the plastic chair
that I'm sitting in
I'm not invisible
just not worth looking at
It's not every day
that I meet someone like you
some one kind
yet so cold
you're not an enemy
not yet a friend
but today
I've decided not to notice
when I wave
and you don't wave back
I am fearless
and unbreakable
and you can't bend me
at least not today

We all know her
she walks tall
too tall
if that's possible
she knows
that when people look at her
they want
everything about her
her hair
her clothes
her smile in your direction
but
it's all an illusion
a trick
that she has power
no one really
has power
no one really likes her
they just pretend
because right now
in this moment in time
she's the one
they want
they need
and she knows it
maybe that's the problem
that she always knows
how great she is
but she's not great
not really
she's a lie
how else can you explain
the fact
that even when she's mean Read more »

It's lovely
sitting here, next to you
my friend
your fingers tap fast
on the key board
writing another
of your wonderful poems
that I enjoy
so much

It's lovely
talking to you
no negative tension
in the air
you haven't said much in a while
you are writing too
you're in your head now
smiling a little
laughing at the teachers joke

It's so lovely
to be here
on a Tuesday
in my hard plastic chair
next to you
you bubbly little ball of fun
you have no idea
how thankful I am
that you're my friend

Yes, I really did dare
that cloudy day
when they struck
Yes, I really do care
when people act
with no respect
But no, I really won't share
why it is
I did what I did

why is it
that poems are easy
and novels
are hard

why is it
that I try so hard
and yet it sounds
the same

why is it
that it seems so long
but really
its only pages

why is it
that while I'm writing a novel
I take a brake
for a poem

I want
a google search box
for the world
and with it
I can see my real friends
and remember
the forgotten corners of my mind
and find
my mind
which I've lost

The things I write are always in the same form. They sound the same, and look the same. I'm officially sick of writing those poems with their witty format and precise topic. So I hope you will notice that this particular poem (if you wish to call it that) is in the graceful shape of a blob. It holds no form, has no pattern, and is read to the most random of rhythms. Really though, I'm quite pleased with this new setting. It's a change of direction, and has complete new scenery. I feel like Alice when she falls down the rabbit hole, or Harry Potter when he arrives at Hogwarts. Read more »

good morning storm cloud
nice to see you
today
you have come to rain on
my smiles
my parade

well hello there rainbow
I didnt see you
there
you have come to make
me laugh
and whipe away a tear

oh and look here comes reality
such a pleasant
surprise
you have snapped us back
to reality
and storm cloud and rainbow
say goodbyes

you know you want to read this
you know that there's a pull
of intrigue and adventure
you know it's got you hooked

you know you want to read this
I can tell by the way act
'cause there's just something about this
that makes you want to stay

the reason you want to read this
is that people have no self control
we get sucked in and lose ourselves
and throw old thoughts away

you know you want to read this
it's just something you got to do
you know you want to read this
now you have and now it's through

I'm over him
it doesn't matter
life goes on
that's what we all think

but maybe it's not true
maybe things will change
and twist
out of control

maybe it will seem
like the world has ended
and that you should
have seen this coming

but we never look ahead
we think we have it made
we take things for granted
like love and friends

some things won't change
for now I'm okay
but that's not true
'cause that's what we all think

so I was walking
when
she caught up with me
and whispered
in my ear
and walked away
and that's when I fell off the side of the Earth

Harry Potter's
got his wand
and his pointy hat
and with a flick
of his wrist
he can make you be a rat

Harry Potter
has some friends
and tons and tons
of fans
and a scar from
Voldemort
who should be in Azkaban

Yeah Yeah...
Harry Potter
Guess who!
Harry Potter
'cause that's the way we roll...

you, my friend
are a friend
I hope you don't mind
that I've decided so

you are so nice
that I couldn't ignore you
and that I had to claim you
as mine

so, my friend
please be my friend
like the ones
of movies

let's chat all night
and giggle in class
and at the end
we'll walk off in the sunset

cause you're
my movie friend

she was
deep down gorgeous
but no one stopped
to look

she was
a true spring flower
that no one bent down
to pick

her soul
was brimming with beauty
so much that it
overflowed

her eyes danced with light
her feet danced at night
her love was as big as
a sea

but no one stopped
to look close enough
or bend down far enough
or bother to see the dripping of beauty on the floor
no one
no one

until him

"no way Jane"
said the brisk like teacher
"you cannot turn in your homework late"

"no way Jane"
yelled the angry friend
"I will not forgive you ever"

"no way Jane"
snarled the glaring brother
"I can't give it back"

so no way Jane
set off on her way
of no ways and rejects galore

her whole life in shambles
her emotions a wreck
all 'cause no one said
yes

you
you evil sneak
are the lemon juice in my eye
I see you come
and I flee
'cause I don't want
to feel the sting

you
every step you take
makes me cringe
and grimace
I fear your bite
and your edge

you
every time you speak my name
you irritate me
because you say it wrong
on purpose
because that's how you roll

you
are the lemon juice in my eye
and yet
somehow, someway
I admire you

One little bird
Tweets a song so sweet
So the other shall
Reply
With a sweeter song still
That catches another’s
Eye
And that little bird
Will join the chorus
With it’s deep down
Crows
And soon the whole forest
Is abuzz with a song
That everybody
Knows

Pain

the icy tip
tore open
a hole in
my burning flesh

the darkness
sunk lower
and lower
as the wound opened

a twisting force
was eating
my insides
and replacing them
with hurt

my eyes closed
I wanted
it over
to stop

for a second
my mind
let go
and i couldn't
feel
the pain

Yes
I can
I will
I shall

No woulda
coulda
shoulda
didn't

Those words
will stop
the tracks
of others

but not
the mighty
me

Yes
I can
I will
I shall

You'll see
I'll counquer
and reach
my dreams

You think
I'll fail
and trip
and fall

but not
the mighty
me