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Sep 12
poem 4 comments challenge: Photo-1 Sunset
SodaPop

On the Dock

I wish I could fly away.
                 Far, far, away.

Away from the hurt, and the pain.
                Away from the give, but never the gain.

Along the border I would walk
               The border of love and hate

The place I call home nevermore.
               The place I was never set free.

Was I even meant to be?
               What if I'm a mistake?

If I can't spread my wings,
               If I can't fly,

What gives me the reason,
             Not to die?


Because here.
On the dock.
 

I.    Am.     Free.

 
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Posted: 09.12.18
About the Author: SodaPop
Soda Pop
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Discussion

Comments

  1. aesythe
    Sep 12, 2018

    You took this challenge very literally, which I hadn't expected from anyone. It's definitely a dark piece, but it ends on such a different note - I think that's great. I was happy to see your narrator felt they'd found a place where they could truly be themselves. We all need a place like that, huh?

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  1. SodaPop
    Sep 12, 2018

    Thank you so much for the kind words. I was feeling kind of down today, and knowing that someone likes what I do makes me smile. :)

    Soda Pop
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  1. Nightheart
    Sep 12, 2018

    Hi SodaPop,
    I love the structure of your poem and how you really describe these things and hone in with specific detail, even though it is a relatively short poem. I wonder if you could even extend this? I feel with more space, this poem could be even better.
    Good job!

    "The only way to deal with an unfree world is to become so absolutely free that your very existence is an act of rebellion"- Albert Camus

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  1. SodaPop
    Sep 12, 2018

    Thank you so much for the advice! I will work on an extension, and I hope that you like it!

    Soda Pop
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