Get the Anthology!

YWP has just published an Anthology with great student work. Support them and YWP! To order a copy, send $17.50 (includes postage) to: YWP / 69 Swift St., #300 / S. Burlington, VT 05403 Order form/invoice, CLICK HERE. Questions? 860-0570 --gg
Videos, sound and info on Anthology Release Celebration.

Prompt responses due Friday

14. Procrastination. If you had more time, you’d be able to put it off longer. What do you put off to the last moment? Why? Tell a story about how you just barely got something done in time – or didn’t.
Alternate: Splat! Use that word in a story or a poem.

Click here for more info about submitting to our weekly Newspaper Series.

The Woods

The Woods

By Noah Detzer
Hartford High School, Grade 12

The darkening sky
Closes another day
As it does every day.
The vanishing light
Leaves the silhouetted trees
Standing in their monolithic glory
Giants sending the day
On its final voyage into the unknown.
And we are left
In the empty void of darkness
Enveloping all light
And sealing it away
For hours, until
The dawn of a new day approaches.

I really like the fact that

I really like the fact that you make the woods seem as a different world to the readers. Have you considered adding another part about that "void" in the woods and what creates that/ what is created by that?

Nice Imagery

I really liked the imagery you created with this poem. You also chose some nice words to use. Like Trish said I believe that maybe you could try to explain what that void is. Otherwise I think this is a very solid poem.

Eric K

I like the word choice and

I like the word choice and the imagery you used. I think that the way you used the tone of the poem made it easy to follow and get into.

The only thing I would suggest thinking about is adding more to it. Maybe add a little more to make it more developed whichthen you could explain the "void" of darkness more.

But, if you decide to change nothing, this would still be a great poem.

Mentors

To read feedback YWP college mentors' comments on entries to the Newspaper Series, click on names below. To read all entries that have feedback, click here. You must be logged in.
To read about mentors, click here.