i think i have had enough of loss

author's note: thank you to MP for that line. You know who you are, and you know which line. Need I say more?

I suppose it is true that nobody ever said

farewells were supposed to be easy

or free of pain

or simple,

and indeed this is not

may you rest in a heaven full of

sunbeams and mice for chasing

and may you find some angels up there

who will love you like we did

like we do

may your sleep be full of

peace and sweet dreams

and may you eat the hair of angels

the way you ate mine

and may you be never forgotten

so I suppose your homecoming will not be

to the back door of the house

but through the front door of my heart

and that day will forever live in my mind when

I saw you in the neighbor’s yard

and called out

and you followed me home

and I suppose you are home in every way that matters already

so may you rest in a heaven full of

sunbeams and mice for chasing

and when you fall down at the feet of the angels

just remember that we loved you too

and may you never be forgotten

nobody ever told me that

saying goodbye was easy but I suppose

I never thought it would be

this hard

and I take the weight

when mother shouts all the time and

snaps at the slightest little question,

when father doesn’t say much,

when little brother recedes into his

television screens to hide from the world

I take the sorrow but I cannot take it from them

and I wish that I could

but sorrow does not work that way

and perhaps I carry more than my fair share

but I do not know how to let it go

I try to believe that we will be lifted,

but you know it’s always hard

but believing is not my easy way out

but faith has never come easily to me

and if I have no faith in

the words of that book

then I will have faith in

angels and heavens

and musical notes

and moments

and sunlight

and singing

because if you do not have faith in those

I do not know how you can go through your day

with your head held high

and a smile resting on your lips

so my dear lost friend,

may you rest in a heaven full of

sunbeams and mice for chasing

and when the angels kiss the top of your

furry little head

just remember

there were some figures without wings

who did it first

just remember that there were some people

in a house in a little town

who loved you

and sleep in peace

and may you sleep in peace

and may you come home eventually

either to our houses or our hearts,

wherever you feel most welcome.

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