Beneath my heels there opens a place in the earth
where I move in darkness, floating
suspended by the very sadness that fills my lungs to drown.
I stand above it, trying not to look back,
feeling the clouds press my shoulders.
I don’t want to fall in.
It’s cold there and the light
is far away.
Yet Loneliness whispers in my ears at night,
she tells me that there is no hope-
that my mother is too busy for me,
that my brother hates me as he hates himself,
that my desperation makes their love
My depression saturated the concrete walls last winter
and I can feel it trying to pull me back in
with greedy grey hands.
Please, my friends, please help me keep smiling.
I want to keep the light in my eyes.