Other Reads:  Daily ReadsRecommendedAudio  |  Genres Newspaper Submissions

Clocks

Hazelnut's picture

 

The last screw in place, He tenderly shuts the door. A final twist to the knob on the back brings the gears to life.  Pride etched on every feature, He gently passes the tiny clock to waiting hands, eager to display it in their home.  Fragile and fresh, the little arms tick, telling the time on its shining face.  The clock strikes one, a sweet note.  A little scratch adorns the back, but none can see the fault, hidden behind the golden face.  Life goes on as the clock strikes two, still the pride of its caretaker’s eye.  A smile creases every face while it boldly chimes out three - still young, still strong.  Four ticks by, followed closely by five. Now, as it sings out six, trembling hands remove it from the mantle, torn by the parting soon to come.  As seven echoes through the halls, it greets a new caretaker. Surviving the bumps and bruises of the transplant, it is soon found comfortable on a new mantle chiming eight.  Nine watches fresh faces join the room. Ten brings trials, soon left behind but not forgotten. Eleven seems to run away, while noon drags on and on.  Now one comes again, an echo of younger days. Chipped paint reminds all that its youth is past. Two creeps by.  Three comes far too soon.  Four brings company to the growing room.  As the wind blows, five sneaks by, unheeded. Careful eyes note gold now grayed when the hands skip six and rush to seven. Eight reflects memories in the polished face.  By nine, they begin to fade, leaving only scars behind. Now the speeding hand slows. But the steady rhythm beats on, tempered by the hours and the years. At ten, the merry voice beings to croak and sputter.  Eleven is shuddered away, purposefully ignored by the caretakers. With a tear in their eyes, they hand the little clock back to Him as the clock utters twelve. The gears cease to grind. The hands cease to move. The notes cease to chime. Tender care in His face, He gently dusts the dented clock and nestles it onto a niche on a broad shelf.  It is surrounded by many other such clocks, worn by time, with room for many more.  Turning back to His bench, He sets the screw, winds the gears, and turns the knob on another little clock, fresh and new.

 

  • 231 of 1952

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.
doug.demaio's picture

This is great. The metaphor

This is great. The metaphor worked perfectly, I was actually alternating in my mind between a mental image of the literal words--picturing the clock and the room, and clock maker-- and imagining the different stages of life. I really enjoyed this piece, thanks.

LancorGoalie's picture

Great Job

There are still so many questios unanswered. Why was he making a clock? Who was this character? Who was the family? How did the clock age so quickly? But very good. I loved how much description you used. Great Job

doug.demaio's picture

I think the beauty of this

I think the beauty of this piece of writing is that the answers to those questions form the figurative half of the extended metaphor that IS the plot of the story. That is to say, you are given half of the metaphor without the other half having to be explained-- you have to come up with your answers to those questions for yourself, but there's just enough guidance from the author so as to come up with a logical sub-plot.

If that makes any sense to anyone other than me, I do not know.