22. Elevator

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You are in an elevator. The door opens and in walks an annoying type of person. Suddenly the elevator stops between floors...tell us what happens. (No real people, please!)

Wishful Thinking

The doors open, I step in without looking up at the face already waiting there. Soft music stereotypically plays from hidden speakers. I go to push the right button but it’s already lit. What makes me look up first is that characteristic smell lingering in the air. I thought I had gotten away from the whole situation, ran away to a secret hiding place where I couldn’t be hurt anymore. Slowly I turn to look at the person beside me, even though I don’t need to see to know who it is.


I was in the elevator and it stopped at Floor 7. I was getting more and more annoyed. When would 10 come without another interruption?

The person who got on was a pink lady. She was holding a hot-pink purse that marched her hot pink coat, pants and nails. Sticking its head out of the purse was a chihuahua. The dog started barking madly. The lady said, "What are you looking at Missy?"

"Oh," I said. "I was just thinking about how cute your chihuahua is."

She grunted and said, "He isn't cute. He is ferocious and terrifying."


I pushed the button down. I was at the movie theatre waiting to see the latest movie featuring Dirk Hansen, "Wormy Abyss." I watched the numbers go up, then the elevator doors opened and I walked in. I pressed the number One. I was on level three. I held the railing and that weird feeling happened as the elevator went down. I looked around. It was your typical elevator -- a silver rail, white buttons, number one glowing. The number three turned to a two. The door slid open and a short man walked in. He had a head bigger than both of his hands combined and huge feet.

The elevator caper

It was a bright, sunny day. I was on my way up to the library to have fun with my friends, but the elevator stopped at the first floor and a weird kid stepped in. He said "hi" to me and continued to talk about everything! He told me his favorite flower, gave me ten reasons why it was his favorite flower, and then told me his name. His name was Rodney, nicknamed Talk-Your-Ear-Off-Rodney, and he wondered why everyone called him that. I think I'm getting the idea why, I thought to myself.

Worst Elevator Ride Ever

I was in a hurry. I had to get to my hotel room, grab my keys and then go back down the elevator again. The elevator up was taking forever, it was agony. But luckily I wasn't sharing this terrible ride with any crazy stranger. I just hoped deep inside that no one would come on before I reached my floor. I was definitely not in the mood to deal with a stranger wanting to talk.

The Elevator Ride

The elevator
It was a cold black night, I had just gotten home from work. (I work at the cemetery)

Assumptions in the Elevator

The heavy metallic doors slide open as I lean against the railing. I feel like the journey upwards may never end. Faces peer in before they enter. A couple holding hands, a little girl and her mom, and a lonely man enter. My mind wanders as I imagine about each of them. I start with the man. I imagine he was once married and lived in a little house. Then he and his wife got in a huge fight which included some fists, flying shoes and teeth which led to their divorce.


I'm just in the elevator waiting for it to hit my floor,

But then a person walks into the elevator and I'm just thinking oh it's just a person,

then, he starts talking, and he's acting really weird, only then i realized he's not a person, he's an annoying person,

so I'm thinking the next floor is my floor, just calm down.

All of a sudden, something happens, the elevator stopped, in between a floor and my floor,

He keeps talking and talking, he's still being annoying, actually I think he is more than annoying, he's CRAZY!



Hello I’m here to tell you the worst thing that has ever happened to me while I was in an elevator. This happened a while back in the year 2009. Here’s a good tip: when you are in an elevator always keep a pair of headphones with you so if someone walks in and is very annoying, pretend urn listening to music. But if the person does not stop talking to you, bring an bipod and listen to it.

Sambo's picture

That Woman

The robust woman brazenly struts in,
her gross weight bringing down the elevator by almost a foot.
She smiles, caressing her arm against mine.
Hey there, sweets
My polite nature emerges, beaming back as kind gesture. She thinks something's wrong.
What's the matter? Boyfriend dump you?
She fails to see me shaking my head, only to continue with her redundant conversation.
I tell you, they're not worth it--men
She's so aggravated, her spit spurs out with her words.

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