11

A Losing Battle

By Dylan Spencer
Chelsea Public School, Grade 11

A million cars must have gone by that day. Every one of them pedal to the metal as if it were a race, and me I was stuck at my godparent's house. My parents had gone to see my grandmother in the hospital for her chemotherapy. They had called the night before and said she was doing great and would be home in the morning. The way I figured all of those cars were headed to see her.

Winter is
crawling underneath my new flannel duvet cover
and snapping my eyelids open at 3 am.
It's pushing warmth out of the neighborhood
the way the autumn breeze pushes the crinkled leaves
off the maple sapling in my front yard
and into the road.
Winter is
trailing behind a rainy summer,
the one that met true freedom the day I met you
by the lake in June. The perfect summer
is a hard act to follow.

Snow will rise up from the lake and ponds,
puddles and streams;
frost will frame our window sills one morning unexpectedly,
as soon as we think an Indian summer is due,
the sun's last kick.
It will cover our cars, and mailboxes.
It will separate you and I from where we once stood
in the fading light of summer.
One day, I will look up from my homework
and see wet slush falling from the clouds.

This is how winter comes;
gradually, quietly, finally.

I laugh, I sigh,
I scream, I cry,
And yet you stay.
When I ask why,
You laugh and smile,
And think a while.
Then you say
“I love you.”
This makes me laugh,
It makes me sigh
It makes me scream
And makes me cry
And I reply,
“I love you too.”

He watches you.
Waits for you.
One day, he will come for you.
Until then,
He picks off the weak,
and watches the poor,
Waiting anxiously,
to knock on their doors.
Be cautious though,
he may knock on yours.

I love being in love,
As much as I hate it.
It’s hard to explain,
But I don’t mistake it.
It’s magical and wonderous,
As it’s scary and mysterious.
Things may blunder us,
But we stay… in love.

I sigh and weep,
at the mere thought of you.
I ask myself why?
My answer:
I can’t stand the sight of you.
You lied and mistreated,
Denied and mislead.
Why did I trust you?
My fault, So foolish.

I love this stuff. God it is so good!
I don’t even have to knock on wood.
I get the same thing,
Each time that bell rings.
I wish this place looked like it should.

shiney silver blade
pale peach skin
slice of pain
cries from within
crimson drops begin

falling down my wrist
and onto the carpet white
adrenalin to much to take
on my lip I bite
take flight

salt from the tears
stings the cut made deep
memories of him
haunt me in my sleep
I'll keep

getting away from the yelling
from slaps and swearing too
tear up the heart piercing letter
and let it fall askew
who knew

that it would come to this
that i would fall apart
and let him tear so viciously
into my heart
depart

from sanity, reality
and into a corner dark
voices calming and soothing notes
in sweet song from a lark
don't bark

at me about stupidity
and mutilating myself so
for you never stood by me
you'll never know
i'll go

away for a while
and get help for this hurt
to much to bear
for one person, it's on my shirt
i blurt

out i'm sorry
but now it's too late
i've cut too deep
i can't see straight
but only my fate

good-bye

shiney silver blade
pale peach skin
slice of pain
cries from within
crimson drops begin

falling down my wrist
and onto the carpet white
adrenalin to much to take
on my lip I bite
take flight

salt from the tears
stings the cut made deep
memories of him
haunt me in my sleep
I'll keep

getting away from the yelling
from slaps and swearing too
tear up the heart piercing letter
and let it fall askew
who knew

that it would come to this
that i would fall apart
and let him tear so viciously
into my heart
depart

from sanity, reality
and into a corner dark
voices calming and soothing notes
in sweet song from a lark
don't bark

at me about stupidity
and mutilating myself so
for you never stood by me
you'll never know
i'll go

away for a while
and get help for this hurt
to much to bear
for one person, it's on my shirt
i blurt

out i'm sorry
but now it's too late
i've cut too deep
i can't see straight
but only my fate

good-bye

shiney silver blade
pale peach skin
slice of pain
cries from within
crimson drops begin

falling down my wrist
and onto the carpet white
adrenalin to much to take
on my lip I bite
take flight

salt from the tears
stings the cut made deep
memories of him
haunt me in my sleep
I'll keep

getting away from the yelling
from slaps and swearing too
tear up the heart piercing letter
and let it fall askew
who knew

that it would come to this
that i would fall apart
and let him tear so viciously
into my heart
depart

from sanity, reality
and into a corner dark
voices calming and soothing notes
in sweet song from a lark
don't bark

at me about stupidity
and mutilating myself so
for you never stood by me
you'll never know
i'll go

away for a while
and get help for this hurt
to much to bear
for one person, it's on my shirt
i blurt

out i'm sorry
but now it's too late
i've cut too deep
i can't see straight
but only my fate

good-bye

No pile of stones
was safe from her,
She looted one every week.
And while the gardener would surely scold,
She’d still skip them in the creek.
He’d yell and call with spade in hand
But she just danced away,
And when his stones had disappeared,
He knew she’d had her way.

I am from hunting camp,
from the cab of my dad's Nissan truck,
and from AC-DC, Aerosmith, Def leopard,
I am from my sanbox under my tree house.

I am from penny candy at the general store
from willie coyote, and tom and jerry
from four wheelers and snowmobiles.

I am from the scar on my knee
from my fourwheeler muffler
I am from calais elementary sports,
from Dale Earnhardt

In the sandbox with my trucks, and tractors
on my fourwheeler at the age of four
climbing the apple tree
I am from Vermont...