death

After a world of war

a new threat awaits

the leadership of a criminal,

whose murder never abates.

  Read more »

Spring, 2076

Diary of Elinor Grace

Smoke. Today I smelled smoke. It wasn't the good smelling kind, either. Good smoke is the kind that comes from leaves. When you burn leaves, they smell good. Gran told me. She said "When I was your age, we used to burn maple leaves. It smelled so good, we all just lied down in the grass and closed our eyes. Noses up to the sun, sniffing like white rabbits. Except, by that point, we were so covered in dirt and dead leaves, we looked a whole lot more like brown rabbits. I always thought the brown ones were prettier anyways." She told me all this about smoke. Her kind of smoke is so different from what I smelled today. This didn't smell like maple, or oak. It smelled like death. And it looked that way, too, with it's dark color and big blanket shape. It would smother us. It did smother everyone else. But Pa shoved his white cloth over my face and ran away. He took Gran. He took Gran who told me stories and rocked me to sleep when I missed Ma. He took Gran who taught me about being a kid. And he left me a cloth, some paper, and a teddy.

She strolled through the alley, trying to make sense of it all. They had simply told her and then left, not even bothering to find out where she was staying for the night. They didn't care about her; all they wanted was money, and now they had the opportunity to get it.

She thought and thought, puzzling out in her mind what she should do. She had no idea where to go, or who to tell, but she knew she couldn't stay out in the cold, icy streets of Birmingham. But she didn't want to go home. then she would have to talk about what had happened. She felt a numbness inside, and now all she knew was that her sister was dead.

Where is he?
Gone, you say
Where is this gone?
Heaven, you say
Where is heaven?
In the father's arms you say
Which father is this?
God you say
I'm off to meet god.
Good bye I say

Your last hour is near;

One last hour.

Understand you only have 60 minutes left to redeem yourself

Repent your sins and pray that your god, any god will save you.

Death's knocking at your door

Evil spirits out for your soul

A shriek arrises in

The silence of the night.

He's coming, you don't have much time.

"I can run, I can cheat this death,"

Says you, though you don't believe a word.

Night's silence is more terrifying than death.

"Enough," you decide, "I will end this nightmare."

A glimmer of last hope

Repent your sins, and pray that something, anything will save you.

.

A/n So, this is totally not finished, I’m going to continue on with it as much as I can.

            From the moment he leveled the gun at me, I knew I was going to die. It wasn’t the fact that I had a three million Euro price on my head, or that the man standing in front of me was the husband of the woman I had killed, no, murdered in cold blood. No, nothing trivial like that. It was that my gun, the one I had pointing at his, was out of ammo. Simple as that. You’d have thought someone like me would have been better prepared, but, I wasn’t.

            “So this is how the Great Snake dies.” He hissed at me, a small, menacing smile lifting the corners of his lips.

            I grinned back, and waited for him to kill me. He wasn’t done rambling, however.

            “Alone, without her little army of rogues in front of her, stuck in a warehouse in the middle of nowhere.” He paused.

And that’s all I’ve got for now. 

~zeus

The night was like any other.  The warm red walls of the living room and cushions of the fancy blue rocking chair shielded me from the dark sky outside of my house. I was watching the television intently, focused on what was happening on the screen. The telephone rang in the kitchen, but I didn’t rush to get it. My mom was still cleaning up dinner and I didn’t want to make the trek down the stairs and into the kitchen and pick up the phone just so that I could hand it off to one of my parents. No, I was comfortable just where I was. A few minutes must have passed before my mom came into the living room. She knelt at the side of the chair and leaned her head against the arm. I have to say, I was confused as to why she interrupted my show just to lay down next to me. Until I heard what she said. “That was the nurse. Grandpa died at 7:05 tonight.” I don’t know how long I sat there, cradling my mom’s head in my lap, thinking Why am I the one she is leaning on? All I remember is not shedding a single tear that night that was almost normal. I didn’t register that an important part of my life had occurred, an event that would shape who I am. Read more »

Time goes by fast,

But I still wish you were here.

Nothing’s the same anymore.

All your smiles, laughs, and games,

They can’t be replaced.

No one could compare to you.

I feel alone,

But I’m not alone.

I know you’re watching over me.

I just wish I could have one more hug,

One more smile,

One more laugh,

One more chance to say,

I love you…

When you passed,

You took a piece of my heart with you.

Time goes by fast,

And I still wish you were here…

Okay, I get it. But, really, why?

Just when I thought my life couldn't get any harder, someone else decides to throw down.

I am not looking forward to next week. Last week was bad enough. 

It was the second time I have held the hand of someone as they drew their last breath, as they spoke their last words. 

At the funeral though, people kept telling me and mom that, that is a gift. From who?

We both looked at each other, like, "what did you just tell us? Really? How was that helpful?"  Anyway, we've dealt with all that comes with the passing of a life, and the responsibilities.  Mom, definitely, a lot more than me. And, I know just by looking at her, she is exhausted, and I can't help her.  She's been there for me, when no one else has.  So, why does she always get 'tapped" by friends and family to be the responsible one to deal with things? We just emptied a house of every memory, just to get another phone call, to deal with another.

So, we are leaving for I don't know how long to deal with more life-ending events. This sucks. I know it happens, and it is a part of life, but this illness and death stuff is really hard, when no one else steps up to deal with it.

I guess I am proud of mom for being there when no one else will, but I don't want to leave home, but home is with her. Leaving is the hardest thing to do.

Done receiving

And believing

Now leaving

No longer decieved

Or any more frost heaves

Only memories of theives

Done retrieving

And believing

Just leaving

Lives so interweaved

So many things to grieve

In utter disbelief

Done believing

Maybe even achieving

Gone, gone, leaving

Done receiving

And believing

Now leaving

No longer decieved

Or any more frost heaves

Only memories of theives

Done retrieving

And believing

Just leaving

Lives so interweaved

So many things to grieve

In utter disbelief

Done believing

Maybe even achieving

Gone, gone, leaving

Last night there was a car accident and someone I know died. This is for her.

**********

You don't know what you have

Until it is gone

How true that is.

We all lost her last night

Like a candle in the dark

Overwhelmed by the tide

I didn't know her well,

But she had a smile like the sun

And when she laughed,

The whole world couldn't help

But laugh along with her.

The wrong tone in the orchestra

"That's me." she'd say "I can't play."

But she could

And she did

Leading us all

One note at a time

Through a cacophony of sound

To the harmonious finale.

We lost her last night

She was in the wrong place at the wrong time

As a drugged up driver

Took out three parked cars

And one pedestrian.

That was her.

Because of one stupid man

Her bright candle flame vanished forever.

He snuffed it out In front of her father's eyes

And so she vanished from our sight

She's laid on her bed in the dark of the night.

She reached out her hand and beside her bed was a knife.

When she was sad or depressed, she'd play with it a little.

Only enough though, to make barely any blood trickle.

But tonight she felt gruesome, she felt dreadful and daring.

She turned up her music so that it was blaring.

She dragged the knife down her pale skinny arm.

She cut really deep; and did so much harm. Read more »

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls

from every corner of the world-

welcome to the Shadow Circus,

where fire is thrown and flames are twirled!

There is hidden danger in every act!

Once we begin, there’s no turning back!

Prepare to be glued to your seats,

entranced and awed by the abstract!

Ah, here now! Our opening trick!

This woman balances on a stick-

but when it’s gone, she’s floating still

while fire dances at her neck!

And look! The acrobats, up there!

Flying, soaring through the air!

But wait- look closer. Could it be?

Flames are dancing in their hair!

Ladies and gentlemen, girls and boys,

put your hands together and make some noise!

Here, ma’am, is a rose for your child-

but hold her tight for this next surprise.

“The Fiery Giant!“ This man is rash!

He’s not drinking water- no! It’s gas!

He lights a match and eats that, too,

and- there! He is reduced to ash!

The Shadow March is starting now.

They, too, float on air- but how?

We need a lovely volunteer…

ma’am? Yes, you. Come take a bow.

Are there strings above their heads?

Or are they floating, as I said?

Are you sure? Check once more.

Not a wire! Not a thread!

Ladies and gents, you heard her say

they’re really floating here today!

Thank you ma’am, but one more thing. Read more »

The sun was the biggest brightest sun I had ever seen fall on the western hills. I looked out over the lapping water and saw the setting of the glowing sphere on the horizon. It illuminated brightly and it grew fright in my stomach. I had another night I had to survive. I knew I should have let it happen. Just let them take me, but I also knew the only way to fail is when you give up. I didn't know if it was actually possible to resist them, but I was going to try.

The rocking of the chair in the kitchen stopped abruptly and I could imagine what had happened as I heard the silent sigh of my grandmother's death. She was too old; she would not be kept as I would be. No one knew what happened when they took you, you only knew you didn't want to let them get you.

There was no moment for me to think of my grandmother as I slipped out onto the roof of her house. I sensed their footsteps and I knew they were close. I jumped off the ledge into the lake below. There was no splash as I glided perfectly below the surface, making a ripple only sufficient enough for a pebble. Read more »

"Things end,"

they had said. 

I didn't believe it.

Wasn't he the one who,

only yesterday,

told me I was his 

forever girl?

Wasn't he the one who,

just last week,

had shown me his 

box of secrets?

Wasn't he the one who,

last night,

had given me an

engagement ring?

I didn't believe it.

But I need to accept it,

for his isn't coming back.

He had entered a land,

a special place,

a place where magic happens.

I wasn't cut out for that place.

At least not yet.

If only...

If only...

If only...

I go through what I could have done,

I run through what I could have said,

anything...

anything...

anything...

I could have told him to stay.

I could have gone with him.

I didn't...

I didn't...

I didn't...

It was my fault,

no matter what

they say.

"Things end"

Live ends,

suffering ends,

love ends,

but death, 

death doesn't end.

Death doesn't care.

Death steals people.

Death steals happiness.

Death stole my heart.

I wish...

I wish...

I wish...

I had 

told him

I loved him

more.

He deserved to know.

He deserved to see.

He deserved to live.

Now, he won't know.

Now, he won't see.

Now, he won't feel.

For he is dead.

Why...

Why...

Why... Read more »

“If you could name that star, what would it be?” He quietly whispered in her ear while pointing to a star among millions. His lips grazed her ear tickling her heart. She laughed a little in the darkness, wrapping her arms around his waist.

“I wouldn’t name it at all…” Her eyes scanned the sky. Her face became serene all emotion vanished. He looked at her and realized in that moment he wanted and cared for nothing else but her. He wished this night would last forever; that her hands would never be removed from the warmth of his side. That the sparkle in her eyes would never fade, her laugh would never subside.

“No?” His words escaped his lips without thought.

“No.” Her eyes skipped across the sky and paused on his face. Her heart raced inside her chest. All she wanted was for this moment to last.

. . .

He opened his eyes; The alarm clock screaming in his ears. His fists clenched tight. Bad dreams... good dreams then, only he wished it were reality. Sadly it had been a year, he wished she had melted into the sky, faded into the moon, the clouds or something… maybe even be that nameless star. But dreams were all he had left. She had died that night… He blamed himself.

It ended with a breath

A quiet hush

In the star-blackened night

Unheard 'neath the sky,

The silent sound of death

Mingled with the flow of crimson

The scent upon the air

Salty, rusty, red

Tainting the wind

And staining the earth

With stolen lifeblood

My mother is cleaning out the fridge

When there is a thump

Like a gravedigger's final pat

On the soil covering a coffin

In a graveyard filled with stones

And all the windows shake.

My aunt looks up from where

She is playing Ring Around the Rosie

With my little sister and nieces

Do you think she knows

That game is about death?

So many omens.

She goes out to the front porch

And is gone for a few moments

When she comes back

There is something cradled between her cupped hands

Something small and feathery

And still.

She walks into the kitchen

And shows my mother

Who is still kneeling in front of the fridge

Surrounded by long since spoiled hamburger

And the lasagna in the back of the fridge

That everybody forgot about.

"Look at this," my aunt says

With the slightly hollow tone

Of someone who is in the presence

Of a capsule devoid of life

And will soon forget about it

Like it never had breath in the first place.

She shows my mother what rests

In the fragile casket she has made with her hands

It's a bird

A little thing of feathers

Who worried like us

But perhaps had more freedoms.

"Oh," my mohter says

Tone trapping the same counterfeit sorrow

As my aunt had

In that "Oh" a cage is constructed

Capturing a shadow of

The real thing.

"Poor little guy must've flown in the window,"

My aunt says Read more »

                “Hush Henry,” my mother hissed at my stepdad from their room down the hall, “you will wake her.”

                “Honestly dear. I doubt she will sleep tonight,” my stepdad whispered in response, “I doubt any of us will. I can almost hear his music blasting; I think I will go shut his door, to ease my mind” Read more »

Sunken skull eyes

pale yellowing skin hanging

from the still slight smile

but I never said goodbye.

hearing the muffled sobs of my family

and your slow, ragged breath

your drugged face no longer shows any sign

that you can understand

but I never said goodbye.

never said I loved you

like my family did,

or held your translucent hands.

I've heard you can see the light leave Read more »

Black night and

sorrow

a whisper and a cry.

Don't you know, darling?

Everyone must die.

Love causes heartache,

a family's severed ties.

The world is so messed up, honey,

care to tell me why?

A stone church with a red door

a somber light blue hearse. 

It's all over school, sweetheart,

Death finished first.

It was a curious feeling, like falling into a deep sleep.

The edges of the world blurred and swirled together like a big melting pot of color.

The pain in my side was fading, diminishing in intensity.

I struggled against the lull of gentle oblivion.

There was something I had to do, someone I had to protect.

I fell towards the light.

It was bright all around, like a room upon waking.

The sky was bright.

I floated into its embrace. Read more »