Jan 02

Life's a Little Blurry Sometimes

Dec 28

The Ceiling Blocks the Stars

I once thought,
That my words were captivated by ceilings,
Bouncing off walls,
Wishing through closed doors.
My words were safe,
From the big outside world,
Where freedom no longer exists,
And our hearts can no longer feel.
But I didn't realize,
My word's cries for help beneath the ceilings,
And screams from beyond the doors,
Were because they couldn't see the stars,
And couldn't get the air,
That they needed to breathe.


 
Dec 28

Sometimes, The Voices Help

*She had these voices in her head,
Or maybe it was just one...
She couldn't really tell anymore.
Either way,
It told her everything.
Everything.*

Keep your head down...
You look better that way.


But if it's down,
I can't see anything.
Only the floor.

Maybe all your eyes deserve to see is the floor.
It doesn't matter anyway;
Who even pays attention to you?


Well,
No one,
But someday someone wi...

Just stop there.
Nobody will ever notice you.
You're worthless.
Powerless.
You're weak.


I'm stronger than you'll ever be.

Are you?
Then how come I witnessed you,
Pulling your hair out,
Strand by strand this morning,
After you looked into the mirror?
That seems pretty weak to me.


I wasn't pulling it out...
I was-
only-
Dec 27

Nothing to Hold

You told me to hold them,

When you were forever gone.

I almost didn't want to,

But as you were gasping for breath,

I agreed.

My mind was screaming,

Tormented thoughts,

While you lay,

A ghostly pale.

My eyes squinted closed to match yours,

But mine were streaked wet,

For as I sat there holding them,

I wondered,

Who was going to be there,

To hold me.

 
Dec 23
poem 2 comments challenge: I Like

What I Like About You

I like the way you sing,
But only in the dark.
You say if we can't see you,
Then we can't hear the quiver in your voice.

I like the way you sleep at night,
With the night light on in the corner,
Just near your bed.
The monsters can't come and get you that way.

I like the way you twitch your hands,
But only when you're nervous or heartwrenched.
It's like you're bottling up your emotions,
Making sure the cap is screwed on tight enough.

I like the way you walk,
So you make sure your footsteps are never heard.
They say you're light as a feather,
But I know you're just quiet as a mouse.

I like the way you talk to me,
But only in the thrill of the night,
When you need help the most,
Like the time your night light went out.

But most of all,

I like the way you smile,
Always during the toughest times.
Dec 18

Everything Will Be Okay

I expect to live at least 28,000 more days on earth.
That's roughly 80 years.
I have already lived 5,536 (give or take.)
The amount of days that I have felt,
Broken down,
Defeated,
Useless,
Unworthy;
They're seemingly more than I can count.
But,
It's okay.
Because those handful of days,
When the world has shown its brightness to me,
Have been the most exciting I will ever see.
They're the only thing I have to look forward to now.
Because those worthless days,
Those troublesome days,
Those days when I feel like I don't matter;
Everyone is having those days.
Those days are virus,
And they're eating away,
At the withering lives that we're feeding to them.
They're taking captive the secrets we hold,
And the lies that we tell,
And those days are giving them away,
To the strangers of tomorrow,
And the hopeless of yesterday.
Dec 16
poem 2 comments challenge: Mundane

The Extraordinarily Ordinary Girl

She came to school,
like every other ordinary girl,
every ordinary boy.
She sat for eight hours,
in the corner of each classroom,
doodling on her class work
and homework she never got the chance to submit.
In everyone's eyes,
she was just a girl,
an ordinary girl.
But to me,
she was a girl
drawing superheroes on the sides of her work,
creating the hole punches into flowers,
humming to herself all the while,
dreaming of a better life,
a better her.
She was extraordinary,
in the way she ignored her bullies
while they taunted her four eyes.
She was extraordinary,
in the way she learned how to stand up for herself
when they ripped her drawings into thirds.
She was extraordinary,
in the way she glared at them during class
while they threw crumpled up love notes at her.
She was extraordinary,
in the way she was ordinary,
Dec 15

Imaginary Phone Calls

Your feathers left you flightless,
And your glasses left you sightless,
As you nestlessed into the darkness,
Of slip-ups and crisis.

Little hiccups contaminated,
The home you left frustrated,
By the whole world you hated,
With the handshakes left unrotated.

From your heart you gave trust,
But all was left in rust,
From the fists that you thrust,
And all she did was leave you in the dust.

"Just stay true,"
Was what you told yourself to do,
But your life became askew,
From the wonders that they threw at you.

Cries echoed the halls,
And painted sprawled upon the walls,
As you wainted for imaginary telephone calls,
From the people who followed the waterfalls.

From despair you stayed tough,
Though your life was consistently rough,
But I know it was all a bluff,
For your words were never enough.
 
Dec 14

Hardships of Deceiving Life Lessons

i. The Devil Only Shows Up on Your Shoulder When You Want to do Something Bad
Heart beating quicker,
Palms sweating more,
Feet moving faster.
He appears to compete,
With the beauty on the right shoulder.
He bribes,
She begs,
He smiles,
She gazes at you with wondering eyes...
She wins,
Of course,
Because stereotypically beauty always wins,
But you were considering siding with him,
The image of appeal floating through your mind,
When you almost kept that five dollar bill,
Instead of giving it back,
To that rich man on the corner of Fifth Street.

ii. Beauty Always Wins
It doesn't matter how many times,
You brush your hair in the morning,
Or how many times you dream of sleep at night,
As long as you keep the mascara next to your bed,
In case they want a picture,
Or if you dye your hair bleach blonde,
Dec 13

Restless Pigs and Us

Whispers drank through the softest night,
While their heads cradled beneath the moon,
Hoping for the florescent buzz of their screen,
To bring the gentle joy from the funniest sitcom.
Instead,
A dog appeared on the square,
Fighting to make it through hurtful voices,
And taunting giggles from just below.

He snorts,
The dog,
Like a little pink pig with muffled cries,
Trying to escape the tube that connects life to silence.
Life fought hard,
But Silence was just too strong.
And Silence decided to stay.

Strawberry scented hair started to wiggle,
And wetness caressed their bodies,
But Silence took over their world too,
As the little snorts started to erupt from their noses,
Just like the dog on the magic box.
The dog that hasn't moved since five minutes before,
Now six.
But,
It's not like I could notice movement anyway,
Over the sounds of restless pigs,

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