Dec 12

Heart of Stone

When I walked by your grave,
Your body stood like grass,
Dancing to the beat of the wind.
When my head crooked up,
Your eyes were shimmering,
Dancing like the rest of you;
Dancing like they were before.
When your weakened hands reached toward your chest,
I could see your frail heart beating,
Like it was glued together by stones.
I was waiting for the one pebble to become misplaced,
And your whole body to crumble to the ground.
The soft,
Sweet smelling ground.
But it never happened.
Instead,
Your whole heart collapsed,
And your body disintegrated to dust,
Feet first moving up.
And instead of crying,
I left,
For I couldn't watch you die again.
 
Dec 11

I Hope You See This

(Photo crdit: Creative Commons License, Google images, Drooping flower from the rain)

I want you to know,
That I know what I did was wrong.
I cried in the bathroom before I went to math.
I know you meant good,
You would never mean bad.
When I hid as you were speaking,
It was out of reflex;
Poorly judgmented intuition.
I think I made you feel embarrassed,
And a little underwhelmed.
I wanted to apologize,
But when I saw you again,
I couldn't walk those extra steps to do so.
I'm sorry.
I made you wilt,
Like a flower after it pours.
I'm sorry.
I acted like the rain,
That made you wilt.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I don't think I can say it enough.
I want you to know,
That until I take those extra steps to see you face to face,
I will stay in that girls bathroom,
Dec 05

Lonely Eyes

When she was a young girl,
Her bright and happy complexion became blighted,
By the cataclysm that decided to hit her.
At only eight years old,
She lost her family to a fire that completely obliterated their home.
She never smiled again.

At fifteen,
She would visit the wreckage of her house,
And watch it slowly decompensate before her lonely eyes.
She would stay there for hours on end,
Crying to the beat of her heart.

At twenty nine years old,
She often felt that she was being eradicated from the ground,
Leaving the planet and flying with her parents in heaven.
Sadly,
It was only a feeling,
And she was only able to dream of her happy self.

At thirty two,
She would wreak havoc on herself,
Saying that everything was her fault.
She would often cut off strands of her hair;
The punishment of disorganization,
For everything she believed to have done.
Nov 27

I Need Answers

You mystify me.
I can't really tell what it is about you,
Or maybe it could just be me.
The way you smell like pine everyday;
It makes me shiver,
And it's in the good way,
And still,
It works.
What is it about you,
If you could just tell me.
Because my smile is waiting for answer,
But slowly turning to a frown.
The winding passage ways of your cryptic mind almost disturb me,
But it's the good disturbing.
Please help me know,
Why you are the way you are,
Why you are you.
It's mystifying me,
And not necessarily in the good way,
But my mind is tricking me,
To thinking all of your flaws aren't flaws,
And all of your flaws are your flaws.
Please help me,
My mind needs easing,
But my heart needs answers.


 
Nov 25

Little Truths

You'd probably like to think you're strong,
You sure try to act like it.
Remember when you dropped that 10 pound weight,
And you said you didn't mean to,
But I knew it was because you couldn't lift it for long?
That should be proof enough.
But the truth is,
You're like my little Charlie Brown tree,
Sad and puny,
But strong enough to hold up one ornament.
Strong enough to me.

You always prounce around,
Like you matter the most,
Like that time you went around the grocery store,
Screaming about everything you did that day.
I mean...
Seriously.
But the truth is,
You're like my cat.
Scared around people,
Just trying to awkwardly find a place to sit during movie night,
On the crowded couch already squished with other cats.
But I'd always leave you a spot next to me.

You're that one person,
Who always falls down to your lowest,
Nov 22

Respected Perspective Differences

She was a ghost of a girl,
She lives her life to the fullest. 
She learned to live on her own,
She's never, ever alone. 
She knew she could never do it,
She always had faith she would. 
Her tears ran constantly while her head stayed down. 
Her smile brightened millions and her head was held high. 
She was but a ghost of a girl,
But she was but the silhouette of a ghost. 

 
Nov 20
poem 0 comments challenge: Wonder

Wondering For You

I wonder why you cried so hard,
The night you left our fort,
The one in the tree,
With nails and boards and your favorite toy.

That makes me wonder why you left your toy,
The one in the fort,
To be left abolished by the night crawlies,
And anything else out there.

I wonder why I followed you from the fort,
So I could escape my silenced head,
To join your chaotic one,
That I tried to brainwash into being okay.

Now I wonder if you really were okay,
After I brainwashed you with glitter,
And donuts,
And shows of all you favorite types.

I wonder why you cried after we finished The Wonder Years,
I mean,
It was pretty sad,
But not that sad.

Now I'm wondering,
Why I'm wondering so much,
When all of your hardships,
Have been in plain sight all along.

I wonder why I didn't acknowledge when all your hope was lost,
Nov 19

The Sad Us

You caused me pain,
But I caused you hurt.
I realize this now,
As I sink like an old piece of dirt,
Stranded in the sea,
At the bottom of the ocean,
Where no harm can be caused,
From all of our commotion.

I hurt you,
But you hurt me,
So together we won't stand,
At least not reluctantly,
For it hurts when I breath,
And it hurts when I shout,
But sometimes I just need to find a way,
To let all of my anger words out.

It doesn't help when I cry,
Or when you look upset,
For it fills my heart up,
With pain and regret,
But sometimes,
My tears just need to flow free,
So after we're done fighting,
I can forgive you so you can forgive me.

But sometimes you don't forgive me,
And that makes me feel,
As though I'm being suffocated,
From a million stings from bumble bees and eels,
That just won't stop.
They just keep going.
Nov 17
poem 0 comments challenge: Don't

I'm a Fool

Don't let your heart,
Get broken into those,
Tiny thousands of pieces,
By that fool you fell in love with over the summer,
Whom let you go for another girl,
With the tight shorts,
And depressing image.

Don't let that girl,
The one with the depressing image,
The one with the tight shorts,
Get in your way of a happy ending,
When she knows she can break you in half,
And always get away with it,
No matter how many times it happens.

Don't let yourself get broken in half,
And then trampled by the stampede,
Of lonely wimps,
Wanting to hold your hand through the fear,
Their fear,
And then leaving you to bite the dust.

Don't bite the dust,
Stay where your at.
Fight for yourself,
Fight for the others,
No matter how much you hate them.
Fight for the boy whom broke your heart,
Fight for the girl with the depressing appearance,
Nov 16

We Were/Are

We were once colorful octahedrons,
In world of contrasting,
Boring shapes.
Black and white they stood,
Bold and outrageous we mounted.
Our heads kept high,
While theirs hung low.
But now,
We are exactly like those circles,
Triangles,
Squares.
Dark and twisted,
Pointy and jagged.
Heads hung low and feet planted to the ground.
Nothing to look forward to.

We wanted too much,
To be much more.
We wanted grey hair and puppies;
To love our enemies.
But now,
Instead of grey hairs,
We got none.
Instead of puppies,
We got plants.
Instead of loving our enemies,
We became them.

You wrote down every book you would hold in your library,
While I created names for every character in my books.
Lively they would be,
Lively you would be.
But now,
Your titles stand scribbled,
And my characters lack meaning,

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