Jan 23

The One Who Lies, Leaves

You Lose.
pity
lies
smiles
nothing

You win.
praise
lies 
smiles 
nothing

I just want an honest answer.
Tell me you love it when I lose,
hate it when I win,
tell me you want the glory, 
you want the prize.
Tell me you work hard,
that you want anything to be at the top.
Tell me you want it
as much as I do,
because if you don't,
you'll be the one who gets left behind.


 
Dec 10

My Golden Book

Nov 27

Anxiety of Assignments

I felt like I couldn't beath
I was getting dizzy
No one was home
I was scared,
Lonely
I was trying to grasp for something I couldn't reach
For something that was too far away
I was scared,
Lonely
The future seemed dark
Like it would be impossible to move forward
and I felt scared,
lonely
As I looked down at my messed up assignment
I saw the future
I could be great
If I just did this
If I could just get an A

I took a break
I started to beath
The tears stopped falling
And I started to slowly, silently
write it again
Oct 25

He, Himself, and Him

I drew a picture of someone loved  It was simple, clean, and elegant. Someone about 14. The strokes were dignified and bold. The eyes focused but dreamy. A sort of... grey-blue. Glasses that make him look dignified and wise. There is a smile as big as the world enjoying every second. And the hair is perfect. A perfect shade blond and It's like a cloud; poofy because it's humid.
If he saw the picture he'd look at it twice, admire the beautiful work, praise me, but he would think it wasn't him, 
because... why would anybody ever draw him? 
 
Oct 21

She, Herself, and Her

I drew a picture of somebody I loved. It was simple, clean, and elegant. Someone about 15. The strokes were dignified and bold. The eyes kind but determined. A sort of...Hazle color. There is a smirk; a sort of taunt on the lips. And the hair is perfect. Shortcut, simple and elegant. The jaw soft but sturdy.
If she saw the drawing she wouldn't recognize it. She would shrug and mistake herself for someone else.
I guess that's what looking in a mirror for too long does to you.
Oct 16

I Prayed to God

Today I prayed to god for the first time in three years.
It was hard but I didn't know what else to do.
I prayed to live longer,
I prayed for a peaceful life
I prayed that I don't have to give up my dreams
And when I stopped praying
I felt just as empty as before
But I was still a girl with a dream and a bet. 
 
Oct 16

We Have Twelve Years to Live

When I was told that I had twelve years to live 
I didn't know what to say

We have twelve years to change our future,
twelve years to change our fate
Twelve years to slow down the heat, 
Twelve years to kill the heat

Twelve years to cry,
twelve years to die,
or 
Twelve years to live,
Twelve years to thrive

I am writing to tell you we have twelve years.
Twelve years to save ourselves from ourselves.
 
Oct 16

Or the Crown Slips

Oct 15

Blooming Flower

Oct 15

Problems of today

I wanted to write about the problems of today
but I couldn't.
My fingers seemed to hover over the keyboard
cause I didn't know what to say.
There was so much I could write about.
The pain and horrors 
the rain, the thunder,
the life, the death.

My eyes, my breath,
taken away by blood
spilled by words of the broken,
by the words of the corrupt
 

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