Oct 24

How do you Tell if You're in Love?

How do you tell if you're in love?

I've heard two different definitions of love, not counting the one on google.

I read the first one a couple years ago, in the book Goodbye Stranger by Rebecca Stead. It's an amazing book, worth reading if you get the chance. Anyways, in the book one of the main characters has to write a definition of love for class, so she writes, "Love is when you like someone so much that you can't call it like, so you have to call it love." Which I think is a pretty good definition.

I heard the second one when I was watching "The Bachelorette" with my cousin during the summer. (Don't worry, this seems heartfelt and real to me. Not too cliche). The mother of the bachelorette says that to her, "love is not wanting to live without someone in your life." Which applies to a romantic partner, family, friends, pets, etc.

If you look up the definition of love on google, you get this:

Oct 24

C R U S H ?

Lordy boy,
what have you done?
What've you done to me?

I can't keep myself from you.
Nearly every time we're together, 

I end up spilling my heart out.

I tell myself
that you do not care.
I tell myself
that I'm just the same as everyone else to you.
I try to tell myself that whatever I do,
out-of-school movies have no effect on you,
though we haven't been in a while.

And I scream at myself that I do not have a crush on you.

It's such an awful word, crush
Don't I know you too well to have a crush?


2. informal
a brief but intense infatuation for someone, especially someone unattainable or inappropriate.

And the definition is not applicable for us.
You are attanainable and appropriate for me.
And this isn't brief.

But most importantly,
I tell myself that
do not
Sep 18

Camp. A home.

I miss it-
I don't.

Don't go taking that the wrong way now,
I miss it much more than I don't.

I miss it for the pizza nights,
whispers of
best friends forever, but don't tell,
sitting on the adirondack chairs and
trading friendship bracelets while talking (laughing)
about anything,

I even miss those I wouldn't have expected to miss.

I miss the sense of belonging,
crawling into our beds after a day of spontaneous fun.

I don't miss some of the people though,
I could've done without them.
I suspect we all didn't exactly need them there.

I just want to go back, rewind in time, and do it all again
(with a few things changed around, of course.)
Be with those 9 people again, who I loved so much.

We all loved each other with a ferocity. 
And -hopefully- we all miss each other with a passion,
Jul 08

Here I'll Stay

but alas here I am, 
wishing you were here
to tell me that even in a sweatshirt and leggings
I look nice 
to give me one of those hugs that you used to hug me with,
hoping I would never let go
but isn't it my fault that we're apart
that you'll probably get a new girlfriend 
and forget all about me 
but alas,
here I am
and here I'll stay.

Jul 08


We had a short-but-sweet time together.

It just wasn't kind enough?
It just wasn't good enough?

Those are some things people must be thinking,
but really,
I just didn't like it.
I don't know why
It was more than good enough
It wasn't right
I didn't feel it the way he felt it.

So I ended it.

Nevertheless, we did have a short-but-sweet time, in the sun, on the porch, relaxed.
Jun 24

poem 3

the way that the dark, emerald-green pine trees look against a clear blue sky is bea-u-ti-ful.
it is quite positively one of my favorite things in the wholee wiiide world.
i suggest that the next time any of you are outside on a cloudless day, to take a second and appreciate the beauty of those pine trees, silhouetted-but-not-really-because-they-are-a-dark-emerald-green, against the bright blue sky.
it es truly ay wonder.
Jun 17

poem 2

the truth that you  don t  care about:

i wish  i d  never met you.
or seen your face
or heard your name

but then (again) if i  hadn t  met yo,
then things would be (...)

quite different.

but i would dearly like to know if  it s  mutual.
i m  guessing not,
but  wouldn t  that be self/centered ?

i truly wish  i d  never met you.
or seen your face
or heard your name
Jun 16

Twelve Chairs

An empty chair

next to a lonely table.

A table set for one,

no happiness here.

Behind it is a longer table;

with chairs for twelve.

But it still seems as lonely as the table set for one,

like if she were invited

to a dinner with eleven other people,

to fill in the eleven other chairs,

she would still

be lonely.

She would still be lonely because she

knows that she is

supposed to be eating at that table set for one.

And that whole time she sits in that room with the eleven other people,

the table and chair would be alone.

Just like she is now.

Just like the table and chair are now.

That’s why she belongs at that table set for one;

set for her.