It's silent as the rest of my housemates sleep. I feel sick, sick, sick as I lay in the bath. The water is cooling but my skin is red. My palms are stained Crimson but it's not something I can't comprehend. I feel like I'm drowning, like the nausea in the pit of my stomach is my soul. My entire being. The indents of my arms are pink and I'm confused. Confused because I can't breathe but the water is nowhere near my face. I feel consumed by a weight numerous times heavier than the droplets dripping down my chest. The shower is running but I am sitting. Sitting and staring at the molded tiles. That's it. My universe. My purpose. The cogs in my brain are turning a million miles a minute as the scalding water feels nothing more than lukewarm.
I miss you. I really miss you. I can't believe you're gone. Sorry my handwriting isn't the best right now. And sorry for the smudged ink, I tried writing with my right hand for once, since you made it look so easy. I know that's not how dominant hands work, I just miss you.
I miss you. I miss you more and more every single day, Phillip Micheal Lester. I want you back, but I know that's not possible. It never really was.
Sorry if you're having trouble reading this because the ink ran. I'm sobbing so hard right now that I can barely hold the pen.
The struggles you are facing today are building the strength you need for tommorow And the past you've faced doesn't define destroy or defeat you it makes you stronger because struggles are required to survive in life Because in order to stand tall You've gotta know what falling down feels like After all The most beautiful smiles have been through the most tears
My family and I moved around a lot, for a family of three. Always in one place or the other. Always moving, like water in a stream.
I don't recall how I met him, in fact my first memory of him was asking if he had a name. He told me to call him Edwin. I giggled at the name and he gave me a weird look. "You don't quite look like an Edwin!" I laughed and stared at his short pale body, unproportionate head, and small legs. Edwin looked more like a "Shorty". "Why not may I ask?" "I don't know Edwin," I laughed slightly " My name's Cameron." "Hello Cameron. Are your parents home?" "I don't think my daddy's home, but my mommy is asleep." "Perfect," he mumbled "Cameron, we'll have to keep this our little secret okay?" "Yep." I stared intently into his purplish eyes. "Cameron. I quite like that name. Do you have any friends?" "Hmm..." I thought "I have a friend called Josh."