Stop, look in the mirror. Take a good long look, Do you see her? In the good old days she was clearer. Where there were no more worries, Damn I miss her. When there were no more photos for the gram Or a boy to hold your hand, Somehow I don't understand how I got here. When I had no more second thoughts And my beauty wasn't bought, When I didn't feel so flawed like I do now. But I'm turning it around, My feet are on the ground. My roots are weak but my will is strong. I'm finding my beauty from the inside out.
My boyfriend, long story short I love him. We have so stories, but this one is simple. It was late February, and I had a horrible never(I blame the stress of midterms). I could barely speak and it had been such a long day. Afterschool, he texted me saying he was going to walk down to my house. I met him outside, thinking he was crazy to walk down in the snow. He held out something to me. It was a Snapple, my favorite drink. Even in the freezing cold, I had the warmest smile on my face. Go out and do something to make someone smile. The littlest things can fill their day with an ounce of love.
All us doubt ourselves. For so long I did about everything. My biggest doubt in myself was my strength. I thought only some were born strong, able to overcome the obstacles that stood in their way. Running used to scare me. I was afraid my body would give up on me, that I wouldn't have what it takes. But running taught me the biggest lesson I have ever learned. True strength comes from your mind. There are so many things in life we can't control. There are so many situations we must battle through. When I started running, I realized I was in control. I controlled every single step I took, and I could go as far as I pushed myself. There are two pains in this world-the pain of displine and the pain of regret. My doubt had held me back too long. I had always been strong, I just never believed it before.
Looking back at this past school year, I realized something. It's not the big events that matter so much. Yes, the dances, the basketball games, those do matter. But what makes a great year are those small moments that make you smile. One of those moments for me was during my 2nd period study hall everyday. At 9:15 everday in the fall, I would ask to go to my locker on the third floor. As I climbed up the stairs, it started getting brighter with every step. Then once I reached the top I saw the beautiful sunrise through the window. It overlooked the parking lot and the baby blue sky. This was my cup of coffee. Every morning I said to myself, "Today's going to be a great day."
You saw her, Sitting there. You didn't say a thing. Teary eyed, Dust filled lungs. Her silent cry for help. "Don't look back," Said your mind. But you hoped someone would.
