Feb 27

Feelings of Loss


Why do I cry like the trees
in fall
and scream into the winter wind?
Why do my silver leaves drip so easily,
with only a simple kiss of moonlight
or the laughter of the lucky bluebird?

Why do I still wonder
how I can embrace the lost,
and warm the cold with my
own frigid hands.

How do I cease to forget,
the feel of a sweet voice
and lazy rays of sun making the dust glow
like my own little constellation of tiny stars.

Why must I adore a ghost
and not a person?

How do I intertwine fingers,
with a shadow?

How can I say ‘thank you’
when I’ve already said ‘goodbye’?
 
Feb 27

A Hug Every Six Thousand Years

Everything bad that has happened to you
is my fault,
I know.
You've told me so many times.

Every curse word you learned
at school
you screamed into my face.
You know more than I do.

I’m sorry you look
a little different.

The principal told me about
how you got locked in the bathroom,
with the lights off.
I know you hate the dark.
You know that they
don’t care…

I know you think I can’t understand.
and I’m sorry,
I really can’t.

I hear you crying at night,
kicking the wall,
punching the headboard so hard
that I can feel the walls shudder.

I’m sorry that you have to listen to me
trying to help
screaming at people on the phone,
sobbing into my pillow.
I’m just trying to find a way
to protect you!

“Why do you care for someone
you don’t love?”

Your words kill me

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