Sep 19

All the sides of me (or at least 75% of them)

It depends on what I'm doing.
Huh? you ask.
I depend on what I'm doing.
If I'm hanging out with my friends you will probably see that we are all very loyal and loving to each other.
I will probably be laughing.
And you will se that I am a good friend.
If I'm dancing you wil see my spirit.
Deep down, under all my feelings,
You will see my core.
Flying, twirling around people, never stopping to think about what happens next.
When I'm stuck with my enimy,
You will see the hostile,
Sharp, quietly furious side of me as she torments me and tries to make me feel bad about myself.
If I am in a room with strangers,
I will probably look shy and confused, but at the same time a slight edge that I am trying to project.
When I am singing, you see the happy, sad, angry, nervous, emotional side of me.
Because songs have a bit of everything.
In anger,
Aug 24

Why I love You

I love you because you always care,
Even when your friends are around.
Because you can make me laugh so hard I cry,
Even if I'm upset.
Because you understand me,
Unless I'm so tired I can't form my thoughts and get them to come out of my mouth.
But even then you understand me sometimes.
Because when I have to wake up early I can have a 95% chance that when I open my email, 
There is a good morning from you.
Because you know when I need reasurrence,
You know when I need a hug.
You give me your hand for support,
A hand to help guide me through my own insecurities.
You don't care I don't know most of your favorite bands,
Your patient when you try to teach me how to play soccer.
There are a million things I can't think of right now but I know for sure that
I love you because you don't care who is telling you what, 
You're going to protect me.
And above everything else,
Aug 20

I Had to Trust

I had to trust that I would wake up that morning and be ready to go.
I had to trust that the long car ride would be fun.
I had to trust that my CD's wouldn't melt or something in the hot car.
I had to trust the waist deep seaweed would end once I got deeper.
I had to trust that the ocean wouldn't try to kill me.
I had to trust to take chances.
I had to trust that those chances would work out right.
And in the moments that I let go and leaped into a world of nothing but chances, a bit of recklessness here and there,
I had to give it all my trust.
And those are the moments I'll remember years from now.
Aug 20

My Hands are Lost

My hands are limp,
My brain is numb.
My hands are not quite sure what to do with themselves.
And neither are my emotions.
My hands feel lonely without your hands,
And my heart beats with the same lonelyness too.
Not exactly a sad beat,
But more of an I had a full heart for a day and now it's more empty than ever.
An I miss you and need to see you REALLY soon kind of beat.
My hands are lost without yours too hold,
And it's all because of a six hour drive of pure joy,
In which our hands never parted.
So thank you for one of the best things that ever hapend to me,
And I miss you more than ever.
May 20

Ready for You

I can't rhyme,
But for you I'll try,
 Because I've known all this time,
You're the only thing that makes my spirits fly.

And you care,
No matter what,
And when I'm in despair,
You better then any chocolate.

And you're the optimism to my pessimism,
And the right to my left-
Wait no, we're both lefties. (anyhow)
When you hold my hand I go numb
And you don't care I like to meow.

And it might be middle school love,
The kind where you laugh and shove.

But we could pull it off because (and I know this doesn't rhyme but)
Because we could be a power force.
And I am so ready for that.
May 20
poem 2 comments challenge: ListenUp

Nice is Different than Good

People always tell me
'You're so nice!"
They never believe that I hate little kids.
Or that I am more than willing to stuff a whole bunch of people into a grand piano.
They don't believe I can start a fight and finish one.
"You're so nice!"

They like to think that I'm caring and good and nice and sweet.
I may be caring,
But only to those I care for.
And I can just as easilly kick you out of my circle as I brought you into it.
You little nine year olds.
Just remember.

I recently was listening to the Into the Woods Soundtrack and came acroos this line:
Nice is Different than Good. 
I understand this.
You can say that I'm nice all you want,
But that doesn't mean I'm good.

And even then,
Everything has its loopholes.
May 20

I never meant it to be a school thing

I guess I just thought that I could tell you because you don't know me.
And it's easier to take criticism from people you don't know.
I never meant it to be a school thing,
And that's why I haven't written since March.
I never meant them all to know.
And now I'm hyperventalating because they're reading these.
So I could change my name and make a new account.
But what's done is done.
And you'll never know if I make a new account.
So haha. 

So I'll keep writing here.
Mar 27

If You're Anything Like Me

If you're anything like me
(which is very hard)
You have an unwanted love for kids movies even though you're thirteen.
And when you turn thirteen an irripressible mood cloud that won't go away.
If you're anything like me
You're sad when you don't read sad books and you think you'll be happy when you read the sad book.
But you can't find a book that's sad enough.
If you're anything like me
You want nothing more than to have someone love you.
Nothing more that to have someone ask you to a dance.
Nothing more then that.
If you're anything like me
You'll have your thirteenth birthday
But you won't feel like it's your thirteenth.
No, it feels like your fifteenth.
But nobody treats you like you're fifteen.
But you're ready.
If you're anything like me
You sometimes wonder if there's something wrong with you.
You almost want to find somthing wrong with you so you can stop thinking about it.
Mar 27

The Best Moments

The truth that doesn’t hurt,
The friend who’s always there,
The invention of coffee and berry smoothie mixed together,
The promposal your waiting for,
The end of a never ending hat,
A hand holding yours,
A tree that hugs you back,
A dance that’s my dance,
The mind that thinks of coffee and berry smoothie mixed together,
And the mind that thinks of the rest.
Mar 27

The Lion and the Ram

Such a friendship these two did have,
The lion and the ram,
Who ran across a field at the pace of friendship,
And walked at the speed of a motor boat.
They read together,
Grew wise together,
And grew up together, too.
They wrote the world around again and again,
A thousand times or more.
And laughed and danced and sang and cried together for evermore.
One was bright and kind,
The other dark and gloomy.
But when they were together, they seemed to grow on each other
And each was just the perfect balance for the other.
The lion and the ram,
An unlikely friendship at most,
Just proved that things you don’t expect are sometimes the best things.
And the best things are friend things,
And friend things are the things that make the other things not so bad.