Jul 30
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Preparatory


What if we held a scrap of the fabric of the world
And put it to our face to feel it’s ragged softness
I saw you standing in the library
Leafing through To The Lighthouse
I could’ve kissed you there
Ripped the pages from your spine
We could’ve killed each other
Changed each other
I’d wash your coffee stains off my sheet
But you put the book back and walked away
Now my hands are empty
Nothing to have or hold
But that’s just as well
For what would I do without this wanting?
Jul 28
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Dead Fly

An insect lay still on the window sill
No longer a fly
For it’s wings were burnt paper
Crumbling beneath the sun’s embrace
How they used to reflect rainbows
A waltz of a fly by the window sill

It buzzed around my head
Biting on any skin it saw
And sipped on neglected sweetness
The fruit peels left from lunch
I’d wrinkle my nose in disgust
And throw away it’s meal
Jul 07
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Daydreaming

The sky! The sky!
Morning orange kisses the earth
It is beautiful for it is something

The other nothings and I admire the sunrise

I've built a house in my mind
With all the sensory details that comfort me

Mold growing in a garden on its walls
Painting peeling off to spiral softly down

Tuck me in beneath the floorboards
Where the world will not touch me

Sip your tea and hear my heartbeat

 
May 19
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Fairy Tale Retelling: Brother and Sister

       There once was a brother and sister whose mother was the most beautiful witch. She tied flowers into the sister’s hair and taught them to make potions. Though the brother did not believe in magic he enjoyed the smell of herbs and watching the cauldron bubble. Their mother was taken before her time, and they always wondered what a kind woman had done to deserve such an illness.
May 08
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Gnome

May 08
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Leaves

Is it the same boat we row round the sun?
I'd rather stay in a place time ignores
The hole we homed in, is it the same one?
Mine was warm enough, you'd never need more

Keeping me sleeping in rose-tinted dreams
Laid like a baby in your steady arms
Now you're chasing change, I'm sewing your seams
Linger a little longer, safe from harm

Leaves free in the wind, stuck in the gutter
You're always leaving, everything ending
Tethered to my tree, still the same color
Autumn takes on which I was depending 

You have to stay yourself, stay here with me
I have to find something better to be
Apr 15
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Saying Goodbye

How I have loved you for nothing at all
With wild hopes you'd give me all you offered
Love is the only cure for feeling small
Am I to write the life left unauthored?

Promises of comfort on couches kept
And peaceful sleep in your arms beneath stars
To wake with the earth, grown cold while we slept
Why couldn't you save some warmth to have as ours?

I tried to find meaning inside of me
Tried to slip it off others sneakily
Stealing meaning from pant pockets at sea
My hands in my heart, grasping at nothing

How you have loved me, I know it was tough
Though I needed more, you weren't enough
Apr 06
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Dried Flowers

    Jon walked home from the grocery store, the brown paper bag heavy in his frail hands. He hardly went out anymore. When he did he studied the empty houses on his street, a ghost of the friendly neighborhood he had known as a young man.

    Jon put the cucumber in the fridge and wondered if it too would grow rotten with neglect. He settled into his recliner and turned on the tv. A game show, mute because the sound made his head hurt. A family was jumping around, hugging each other, they must have won something.
Feb 26
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A Painting

He is an artist with furious, biting hands
He scribbles scenes he hasn’t seen
“But I’ve been there,” he says
Gesturing to a distorted image
It appears to be a festering wound

You are the soldier
And you are the artist
You are the nobleman, the commissioner
Paying for palatable pain

Show me a man on a horse
More than a man, a mission
With a god-given gun
We’ll say it wasn’t greed
That he was like a greek hero

And don’t you want to die for your home?
In a hole full of boys,
Eyes as empty as their future
Don’t depict that in your painting

Your hands are still biting
They rip up the ground
And spit out the flowers in a ravenous frenzy
Don’t depict that in your painting
Say you grew a garden instead
It’ll be easier on us all
Feb 08
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Romantic Movies

If I wasn’t myself
And my lips belonged to someone else
I’d ask you to kiss me

I am incapable of being human
I am incapable of feeling love
But I cry anyways
I choose to cry and pretend to yearn

I’d like to learn how to be held
But I hate the feeling of your arms around me
Don’t remind me I have a body

Lie to me and be my movie love
I’ll turn off the tv
Disappear into my blankets
And dream I left it on a moment longer

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