I am guilty

The bars which restrain me
are but my own fault

I am guilty

The lifeless walls
frozen, unfeeling
yield no give as I fight to break free

My crimes:
To want,
the stars 
their sparkling light to be my guide
the black fog of their words 
which hide the galaxy from veiw 
to disapate 
To feel,
a fires feathery caress
the purity, the finality
without the burn
the branding of my mistake
To hear,
wispers of hope dancing on a breeze
ignoring the calls, the screams
of those who wish to drag me down 
To taste,
the freedom of the sky
the love as it encases my body
without falling,
hitting
the hard ground 
To see
directly into the eyes of the sun
without being blinded
To smell,
sweet victory
without the stench of envy, arrogance and spite 
turning heavenly perfume into sufficating oder

The wind
brushes my cheek, with a kiss. 
Neck craned, my eyes
skim the sky in bliss

The scene before me,
a canvas to interpret,
I stare, deep within the soul of each star
this game I refuse to forfeit.

A world where magic,
still survives,
leaping and twirling,
in front of my eyes

I’m afraid this beauty
does not last.
The sun soon comes up,
the night, simply a memory, in the past. 

 

Heat, curls it's cruel tendrils
around my weakened limbs,
Squeezing every drop,
of hydration from my body.

Time drags pathetically by,
It feels as if
I am 
Luis 
and Clark
traveling their trek
Over,
and over
and over
Again.

Bumbling bodies
make mayhem in the madness.
Humidity,
the overwhelming
unwanted
unexpected
unwarranted 
clingy hug.
Crushing harder
with each breath,
stolen from the air
by those 
who surround me.

The weight of a boulder 
sits firmly on my chest.
I fail to lift it
time and 
time again.

There is but one machine
strong enough
to hoist the force
that burdens me.

Unfortunately,
I must wait 
to be released
from the hotbox
in which I sit.

Staring at screens
Till my eyes blur
Listening till all I hear

Two meters away you sit at your seat,
across the isle, from my stationed feet.
Felicity sparks a fire within me,
burning with passion, I feel, but does he?
I could watch you for hours,
with dreams filled with flowers.
Red roses in hand,
dancing, to the beat of the band. 
Gentle, kind and extremly sweet,
yet you're flirtatious with others, to whom I can hardly compete.
Your very presence is the treasure I seek,
yet your lack of aprehension continues its streak. 
 

Beauty will never cease to exist in this world,
it simply goes into hiding
from time
to
time,
waiting for a special someone
who cares enough
to come looking.

Someone who is
strong in the ways
most of the world is not.
Kindness
Caring
Love

Someone who will gently peel back
the branches hollowed by suffering
that mark both death and life anew.
Someone who will caress
sorrowful life left in nature
with true pain in their hearts.
Someone willing to apologize
for the hurt, death and destruction
the entire human race is responsible for.

Be That Someone


 

Sharpened to a point.
Leaving not a scrap
In relationships. 
Tendency to hate
Evil, pure evil
Envious
Narrow minded
Angry at everyone and everything
Gaping mouths
Easily threatened 
Ready to fight
Spiteful till the end.

 

Dear Fellow Self-Obsessed, Loose Lipped Teenagers,

          I would like to start off by saying, I DON’T WANT TO HEAR IT! I didn’t ask you for fashion advice, so don’t bash my clothes. I didn’t ask you if I was right, so don’t tell me what I did wrong. I definitely didn’t ask for your judgemental eyes to watch me and your loose lips to gossip about me. Halls have ears. Hundreds of ears. They also have gaping mouths with literally no filter. Keep that in mind the next time you talk trash.

Drink this every day before going to school. This concoction garentees school day survival with very few (if any) emotional explosions, delemas or screaming. 

- 3 cups of fake smiles
- 1 ½ cups of liquid brain fog
- 10 tablespoons of “don’t care” powder
- A brimming ½  cup of airhead laughter
- 1 cup of chill-aid
- 1 teaspoon of cluelessness
- 2 ground stricken eyes
- ½ teaspoon of complain_a_lots
- 1 pound of daydreams



Best served with a slice of humble pie:)

Teeth grinding,
finger twitching,
knee bouncing,
lip biting,
heart rattling 
emotion.

Urrrggg
Ahhhhrrrggg
Grrrrrrrrrr
harrumpphhh
AAHHHHHH

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why                   Why

                                                                      

my lips;
a gory prison
for the words that
scratch
bite
claw
shred skin
in an effort
to break free

Yet
I hold
them back

Posion

They slither 
grabbing hold of my heart
shaking
taking
breaking
still I won't let go

Wrestless
I shift
twisting
turning
hurting

They never stop
even in my dreams

Dear Santa,
It's me again. Whitney. I’m writing to you today in a suspended moment of frustration and disappointment. This world has become so messy I can barely walk without tripping, gagging or falling. I’m sorry to say but this year my list is much longer than in years past. Life has been insane. And not in a good way. The creatures that roam this earth are anything but human. At least they must be, for I don’t understand how any human could treat another the way they treat each other. So in this season of miracles and magic I write you this letter in unbelieving faith that maybe just maybe… one of the many wishes on my list may come true. 

1. I want Christmas cheer to be ignited in the hearts of all. May they spend the holidays with a smile on their lips and a heart oozing with love.
2. I want those sick and in pain to heal so that they may spend the holidays with family and friends.