May 16

The Light Is Always There

Mar 22

In The Words of My Idols

To find
to find the exact words
to find the perfect words
to say less but to say more
was ideal with this project 
i dont relate to you
i dont relate to you,  no
'cause id never treat me this shitty
you made me hate this city
mother, should i run for president?
mother, should i trust the government?
im falling again
im falling again
im falling 
things i once enjoyed
jut keep me employed now
things im longing for
someday ill be bored of 
DONT GIVE UP
DONT GIVE UP
stop playing with me before i turn you to a song
stop playing with me before i turn you to a song
dont be that way
fall apart twice a day
Jan 23
poetry challenge: Teenager

à la Kurt Cobain

I wish i loved you in the 90's
we would've met running from the cops together
a punk nightclub behind us
smears of maroon and black lipstick on our collarbones
the neon green admittance stamp on the backs of our hands
fading away into nothingness-
the work of spilled beer and sweat-
maybe your lip split open in the chaos 
so when I would've kissed you the first time
it'd taste like blood and something indescribable;
a dream dropped form the top shelf
shattered into a million pieces on the hardwood floor
only broken things can fix broken things
so maybe that potential kiss would've solved the universe. 
if not the 90s, maybe the first decade of a new century
a teen's midsummer night's dream;
everyone moving
everyone screaming
the band onstage yelling something we can't hear
but we burst our lungs out anyways
you turn around, see me, and the rest would've been history

Oct 18
poetry challenge: America Now

Be a woman (letter from society)

Be a woman
don't wear baggy clothing
look attractive
NONONONONONONONONONO
don't be tempting or seducing or sexy; men can't help themselves.

Be a woman
keep your head high
speak your voice and your mind
NONONONONONONONONONO
be quiet; your opinion doesn't matter because you're a girl

Be a woman
eat salads and sandwiches and fruits 
eat everything 
NONONONONONONONONONO
you eat too much, go on a diet
omg look at her
she's so skinny
she obviously has body image issues
she doesn't love herself
why can't she be happy with her body?
i liked her before her diet
no man will want a woman that thin
she should see a doctor
something's wrong with her

Be a woman
Be the light in the room
smile
sparkle
brimming with confidence
NONONONONONONONONONO
Oct 05

Titanic

I am floating in an ocean of tears
trying to not melt & fade away
become one with everyone else
when a boat comes along
i know they're different
i know they're not meant to be ere
& yet they are
scientist at heart; curiosity my drug
i float
let the tears part & give way for me
& for a moment
i am happy 
because maybe just this once
the ship won't steer away.
we move closer and closer
& then i see it
the slight shift in direction
they've seen my danger beneath the surface;
they don't want me anymore.
i stop moving
but it's too late
& we crash
another boat at the bottom of the sea
another time i shatter into pieces
but sooner or later
i freeze myself back together
& i spot another ship.
at some point
you'd think I'd know better.


Loving me is suicide
     -Nessa Barrett, "la di die"
Aug 01
poetry challenge: Writing 2022

A Village On the Coast of Nowhere (The Wayward Traveller)

Their lamps constantly flickering –
begging for someone
anyone
to stop by 
and say hello,
acknowledge their existence.
The houses are small and
squashed together, 
but no one feels discomfort.
They each know their neighbors and beyond.
They like it that way.
During the night
time slows
almost but never pauses
and the people come out,
girls with their hair braided,
careful works of their mothers,
boys with their hands tucked in their pockets,
careful works of the universe,
everyone else with their voices
and they gather around, not a fire,
but rather the aftermath.
The hot coals burn neon red and orange
and the people tell their stories,
the universe intently watching them,
allowing a hesitant silence in the world.
During the day
they resume their lives as "normal" people
but they know their place in the stars,
Jul 24
poetry challenge: Writing 2022

what being a teenager in today's society feels like

how do you write a story
when the words just aren't there
or they're out of reach
floating above your head-
fingers skimming the bottom of them
every time you try to jump back in control-
but they tease you
always dressed in grey silk so you never know
what they truly are
(isn't it funny
how that can be applied to so many other things?)
they always say 
"speak up"
but when we ready our guns loaded
with our personal truths
they pull up their shields
bouncing our bullets back towards us
labelling us as the victim
saying it's our fault
& sooner or later
we stop trying
we stop talking
we stop attempting to make them understand
                               to be heard
& we place tape over our mouths
but they drew the stencil
they bought the tape
they guided our fingers to press it down
over our voice
sometimes
Jul 15
poetry challenge: Rights

Regrouping

do you ever get the feeling
where your body goes completely still
your mind completely silent
nothing feels quite right –
similar to dysphoria but in a way more intense
and you just sit or stand
watching or listening to something
regardless of it being the news or just the world
and at first
you have no clue how to react?

to every kid that has died in a school shooting
to every kid that has been traumatized in a school shooting
to every woman who just got their rights to their bodies taken away
to every person who has been denied health care
to every person who now has a mountain to climb every time you try to vote:

I am sorry.
this should not be happening
we should have our rights
regardless of what they may be
regardless of which ones you might be passionate about

we're all human
and yet
sometimes it feels like with the rights I have being taken away
Jun 29
poetry challenge: Scars

700

i talked to someone today
i talked to a man in canada over a chatroom
he didn't say much
we chatted back and forth nonverbally
he asked me
did a cripple deserve love

i said yes
because everyone does

he asked me why
because i was the first person he'd ever talked to 
that said yes
and i told him
everyone deserves someone
and physical ability doesn't define what a person is
neither does apperance
or an impulsive choice they make
you cannot determine who a person is
just by what they might be

everyone has dreams
i asked him what his was
and he described being with the love of his life
captured every moment in lightened detail
painted an image i could see clearly
and i could imagine it for him
i could see him making his dreams a reality

but he didn't believe me
he said he'd been turned down to 700 jobs
700

Pages