My mother let my older sisters choose my name.
I must admit, it's a beautiful name...
It just doesn't suit me.
When I try to accept my name, it's like trying to wear a shirt that's four sizes too small
It just won't fit, no matter how hard you try.
It's definitely a girl's name and I'm technically a girl, I see why they chose it.
It's just not who I am.
I don't behave, dress, or talk like a girl (and I honestly look kind of like a boy), so why does my name have to be so...
So easily dismissed as female?
It's why I go by Alex, Al, A, or some other variation.
Most of the time, people choose to call me Alex.
It kind of fits, but not quite.
It's like a shirt that's only two sizes too small, so you deal with it.
Since Alex is a gender neutral name, people find it easier to look past the fact that I'm physically a girl.
In fact, some of the boys in my class didn't realize that I'm actually a girl, until a substitute teacher used my full name.
I get along with the boys, dress like a boy, act like a boy, talk like a boy, and kind of look like a boy, but I'm not a boy.
But I'm not a girl either....
That's the part people don't understand.