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Jun 24
poem
Drift

Tough Pill to Swallow

I.
I remember swallowing a lump in my throat
you fiddling with your hands in the chair next to me.
We were nervous energy, unrefined
and just waiting to crash and burn.
Caffeine capillaries
and bloodshot eyes,
we knew our late night and early morning
with fingertips tapping at keyboards numbly.
That lump melted away as the sun shone down
from behind us, warm and inviting.
I knew it was fine.

II.
I remember clearing my throat in your car.
I swallowed hard to forget.
You laughed,
spindly fingers turning the knob on the car radio
to full blast
as you whipped down the straight away,
windows down,
and me yelling.
You screamed along,
lyrics visceral and raw.
I could feel your form
breathe in the sunbeams
and you lit up
with the light and fire
of a thousand stars in broad daylight.

III.
I loved you.

IV.
I remember driving in the rain,
my eyelids heavy.
Iced tea bellies
and thrifted wares,
our wallets were lighter
but our memories bigger.
I had my hand in yours
and it was warm and comforting.
I was shivering and you told me
to grab your jacket from the back
and I curled into that worn denim
and cherished it.
We got home too fast.

V.
I loved you.

VI.
It’s hard to swallow
and my head is reeling.
It’s fuzzy and fleeting,
drifting from my field of vision
like your dainty dandelion wishes.
Fleeting.
That’s how I’d describe it.
It was raining again as we drove.
I remember us arguing.

VII.
The end is hard to swallow.
I loved you.
But we gave up.
 
  • Drift's blog
  • Sprout
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Posted: 06.24.18
About the Author: Drift
MSG / CONTACT
RECENT LOVES
  • Germination
  • Sour Secrets
  • We Are
  • Different
  • My box of feelings
RECENT COMMENTS
  • Aw, I'm so glad it made you
  • Aw, thank you Shannon. I
  • Your word choice and language
  • I love how simple this is.
  • Of course I had to share this

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  • Tear Soaked
    You called me,asked me over the phone.I could hear the tears Read more
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  • For My Parents Half A World Away
    Alternate Title: I Don't Know You But I Love You Just the Same Read more
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Discussion

Comments

  1. semacdonald
    Jun 24, 2018

    lonna, i love this. the roman numerals definitely add something to this. they almost split the poem into chapters of a love story. i really like that. i love the phrases “caffeine capillaries” and “iced tea bellies”. i can not only see the scenes in the car, but i can feel them because ofthe way you describe each scene. thank you for this.

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  1. Drift
    Jun 30, 2018

    Thank you Shannon!

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  1. flowerdragon
    Jun 24, 2018

    This is unique and beautiful.
    I really like how the poem flows together, and "with the light and fire of a thousand stars in broad daylight" is an amazing line that shows so much emotion.

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  1. Drift
    Jun 30, 2018

    Thank you! I’m glad the flow worked and I got across the emotions effectively.

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  1. jbird18
    Jun 24, 2018

    You've captured the sweet and light elements of this love story alongside the sadness of the relationship ending. And this ending is validly disappointing even though the relationship itself was so sweet and nervously energized (at the start).

    I also have to second the comments of Semacdonald and FlowerDragon

    Nicely done!
    - Janet

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  1. Drift
    Jun 30, 2018

    I’m really glad the ending was disappointing enough (something I never imagined saying genuinely). Thank you Janet

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YWP is a creative, online community of teen writers and visual artists. We're based in Burlington, VT, and we welcome young creators from anywhere!
Young Writers Project | 47 Maple St., Suite 216 | Burlington, VT 05401
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Contact: Susan Reid, Executive Director: [email protected]; (802) 324-9538