missed deadline

It was my fault completely

I’ll say that much

But to my defense it was July

And I don’t do much thinking in July

I don’t meet many deadlines in July

They told me that my school email would die in July

That much I was aware of

But I kind of wanted it to

It would shut the door and lock it

I wasn’t returning anyways

So what did I care if they sealed that crypt

But I completely forgot

In my July coma

That my school email was tied to my poetry

I had let the fire burn one too many bridges

And when the smoke cleared I found I was on the wrong side of the river

Banished from a part of myself

To look but never touch…

And maybe it was for the better

18 years of artifacts prettily displayed behind glass

But it is so difficult

Trying to convince myself those footprints in the snow were mine

Even though my shoes fit when I stood in them

And now when I look back

I can’t help but think someone else wrote all that poetry

I can’t help but wish I wasn’t split in two this summer

But it’s my fault

Because I can’t remember deadlines in July