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Mar 04
poem 4 comments challenge: Parkland: What can you do?
sophie.d's picture
sophie.d

Long guns and troubled minds

When I was five there were severe weather drills
Where strings of children lined up in the hall
Away from the windows 
Out of reach of roughy blown projectiles.
One only had to listen for a ping of rain or howl of wind
Vulnerable to mother nature. 

The storms have become more powerful
As our smog warms our home
But I cannot remember another such drill. 
For, we have long surpassed any terrors our earth can create
With long guns and troubled minds. 

Raindrops have melted into gunshots 
Howling wind into grief. 
Children are not protected from outside threats
But the terrors that emerge from the inside. 
It's humans we all fear. 

The answer doesn't lie in more guns, or drills, or security
It's hard to be protected from ourselves. 

We need love.
To be those five year olds
Holding hands pressed against the hallway
Before comfort became paranoia. 
To see each other fully
Retune our ears from the loud bang of a gunshot
To the soft brushes of human emotion. 

We were all children
With clean hands and whole hearts. 
Blighted by a world that wouldn't listen. 

Let tragedy lead to change inside us all.
Let us sprinkle the goodness of 17 souls among the world
And let us be loud with passion and quiet in listening. 

Let there be peace on earth. 
And let it begin with me. 



 
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sophie.d's picture
About the Author: sophie.d
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Discussion

Comments

  1. Nightheart
    Mar 04, 2018

    This is a great poem, I love the tolerance and love that you teach. You really paint a vivid picture that helped me enjoy the poem even more. Thank you for sharing!

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  1. ShanRippWriting
    Mar 05, 2018

    I really really love this poem! I think you capture that pain and worry really well, especially through the use of the weather metaphor all throughout. As a suggestion for clarity, you might want to consider changing the line "Children are not protected from the outside
    But the inside." This is saying that the children are being protected from the inside, when I think you're trying to say that they're not protected on the inside by those on the inside? Great work I loved this, Shannon :)

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  1. sophie.d
    Mar 07, 2018

    I changed the line and hope it's clearer now. Thank you so much for the suggestion!

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  1. Love to write
    Mar 05, 2018

    I really love the imagery you use through out the poem! I enjoyed the part where you described the weather drills with the nervous five year olds pressed up against the hallway holding hands. I think it shows strength in a quiet and subtle way.

    “When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.”
    -Maya Angelou

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