This is one of the scenes in my novel I'm writing that I particularly enjoyed creating... feedback much appreciated, I'm entering it into a contest. :)
Kiato leaned forward on his chair, resting his elbows on his knees casually, the cup of hot tea that was now resting just behind his elbow swaying dangerously close to spilling all over his lap. "Well, I could tell you're a servant. The merchant's, I suppose. What's your name, love?"
Percy grimaced, almost as if he had forgotten the fact that he was posing as James' loyal servant, and the reminder of it had made him a bit sick. Still, he answered the question only a bit less enthusiastically than usual. "Percy Anthony Planthony at your service!" He chirped, and he began to reach up to his head to take off his hat in the respectable Frellensae manner, only to realize he didn't have a hat anymore, and he sulked into the back of the sofa. The sofa was, to be honest, less of a sofa and more of a giant marshmallow, therefore this sulking movement made the whole piece of furniture squish down to one side, causing Micha and James to nearly get swallowed up in it as well.
Kiato grinned. "Well, Percy Anthony Planthony, if you don't mind me offering, I would be willing to pay you much more per month than your current employer is even capable of offering. What do you say?"
James, who had chosen that moment as an opportune time to take a sip of his tea, nearly choked on the liquid, tears coming to his eyes for a second when the hot beverage spilled all over his arm as he coughed. "W...what?!"
Kiato held up a hand. "I hope you don't take this in the wrong way... of course I can tell you are dearly attached to you servant."
"In the wrong way?! In the wrong way?!" James sputtered. "I can say quite honestly I'm taking this in the exact right way! How dare you-"
"It was just an offer."
"It was derogatory!”
Kiato frowned, looking as if he were deep in thought for a moment. “Would you care to tell me exactly what you find derogatory about my statement?”
James scowled at the man, but didn’t say anything more. Kiato nodded as if he had, in fact, said something that had concluded the argument, and he turned back to Percy, who was growing quite uncomfortable.
“What do you say?” Kiato appealed.
Percy froze. He didn't want to offend of refuse the man, but he wasn't a servant. He didn't want to be a servant. Accepting the offer was not an option. "I..."
"What he means to say is that he absolutely does not want to work for you," James swooped in, and Kiato raised an eyebrow.
"You seem very confident about that."
"That's because I am."
Kiato raised the other eyebrow. He took a sip of his tea, using the ingestion of the beverage not as a refreshment but as an excuse to not have a witty reply coming out of his mouth right away. Finally, he put the tea back down, as it had emptied quite a while ago, and he had begun to feel quite stupid drinking air. "And I suppose you know exactly what your servant is thinking at all times and therefore are the best person to ask when there is a question of his choice?" He said, and James crossed his arms, turning to Percy. "Well, Perce, what's your answer?"
Percy began panicking once again, and he wrung his hands together. "Um... I'd rather just stay employed to James, thank you sir."
Kiato leaned back in his chair, putting a foot on his knee poshly. "Ah. I see. Well, no harm in asking, I suppose," he decided. "...But I can't help but notice, 'James' -as Percy called you- the fact that your servant is continually calling you by your first name. It can't be because he has no manners, for he has called me 'sir.' So you know what I think, 'James?'" He leaned forward again, his tea cup nearly falling to the floor. "...I think that Percy isn't really your servant. And I think you aren't really a merchant. I think you're all fakes."
Mecha made a move to stand up at that moment, but stopped herself as Feilin looked at her and shook his head slightly. She reluctantly stayed put, but tried not to be pulled back into the cushy depths of the sofa once again, just in case she would have to leap up quickly, either in defense, attack, or in flee she was uncertain. (Mecha had learned over the years that Feilin’s judgment was normally on the correct side of the scale, but when he was wrong, things usually ended up worsening to a huge extent. Lessons learned: trust Feilin and his judgment, but not completely.)
“And you know what I think?” Feilin replied in a reproachful tone, “I think you’re a spy. Hired by Levestar.”
Kiato laughed. “My dear friend, what in the world would make you think that?”
Feilin’s grip on the arms of the chair tightened. “How easily you seemed to figure everything out. You knew we were undercover, didn’t you? Before Percy even said a word. You seemed to know something was up the moment you opened the door. And nobody’s that quick.” Nobody but me, Feilin added quietly to himself.
Kiato crossed his arms. “Hm… well, if you think so… why don’t I tell you a little bit about your friends here…” he made a general gesture to Percy and James “…and then you can tell me again that nobody’s that quick, if you like. Because I promise you, I am very quick, if that’s the word you’re using for it.”
“Using for what?” Lesinthur asked, mostly regretting asking the question as Kiato turned and smirked at him.
“Using for genius,” he said, then took another sip of his tea –which no longer existed, but nobody but himself knew that, and it was simply for dramatic effect.
Feilin raised an eyebrow. “Alright then. Say whatever you think will convince me you didn’t get information from an enemy source. Convince us you really are a genius, as you said,” he baited, and Kiato grinned.
“Only if you all promise not to say a word as I am speaking. In fact, start not talking right now, just to be sure. Okay, so, where to start…
“The first thing I noticed was the mud on the sleeve of James’ –or ‘the merchant’s’- jacket. If he had bought it himself, he would have been much more cautious about not getting it dirty, for it looks like an expensive coat. So could it have been a gift? No, because when I asked him if he liked or had a cat, he said no, and there are just a few cat hairs clinging to the fabric of the shoulder. Someone rich enough to gift such an expensive coat would most definitely not own a cat, as pets of any kind are not allowed in any kingdom arias. So that means… you stole it. And your shoes don’t match the rest of your outfit, by the way. Any fashion-conscious gentleman of high society would have noticed that.”
James looked deeply offended at this, as he considered himself to be quite fashion conscious indeed, but didn’t say anything.
“Another thing: James and Percy noticed the painting on the wall before I turned the oil lamp on, even though it was quite dark in this room at the time. This points to the fact that the two of them are very used to seeing in the dark, which suggests that not too long ago, they used to reside in Under Frel, and had been for quite some time before coming up to the surface world again. That also explains James’ nervous tic of looking up to the ceiling every once in a while, as if to check if the ground above him isn’t caving in. Another thing I noticed about the two of them –if, in fact, I am only deducting facts about them, which I dearly hope is correct, for I am quite enjoying it- was that James seems quite attached to Percy, yet Percy seems to take James for granted. Usually, that is not normal in a master-servant relationship, quite often it is in fact the opposite. Anyway, even though Percy obviously takes James for granted, James didn’t seem at all worried that Percy would accept my offer of employment. So I figured that Percy was posing as your servant. But why would he do that? I wanted to figure this out. So I made my other… interests in Percy apparent, which, to my expectations, made James quite unhappy and maybe a little protective… so I entertained the idea that Percy was not only your servant but your lover, but I soon I decided that it was much more likely that he was posing as your servant because your relationship was, for reasons I didn’t know, prohibited. But…” he continued with a dramatic wave of his hand, “after further inspection, I realized that James was extremely surprised that I was apparently interested in Percy beyond employment, almost as if the notion had never occurred to him, which points to the fact that James finds Percy completely undesirable, and therefore Percy is only posing as his servant because he drew a short straw. Either that or James finds Percy desirable but never expected anyone else to, but that is unlikely because of a human trait called jealousy, which James proved he had lots of in his reaction to me saying that I could offer Percy a much better salary than himself. His jealousy to that, I realized, was not out of romantic love for his companion, but was possibly out of guilt. But guilt to what? That is the one thing I could not fully compute. Percy is obviously not more than five or so years younger than James, and Percy is, technically speaking or not, an adult. So it couldn’t have been guilt that consisted in any kind of neglect unless…” He turned to James and Percy –who were beginning to quite regret coming anywhere near here in the first place, much was the rest of the company- and narrowed his eyes in thought. “…unless there’s something not quite right about dear Percy… it wouldn’t be surprising, no-one nowadays is quite right. But there does seem to be something off about the darling, obvious or not. So…” Kiato stood up then, as if it were the finale to a great spectacle –which, everyone had to admit, it kind of was- and announced, “what is wrong with Percy Anthony Planthony is the only deduction I was unable to make! Do you still doubt my abilities and my word, or can you safely agree that I am, in fact, ‘quick?’”
Kiato leaned forward on his chair, resting his elbows on his knees casually, the cup of hot tea that was now resting just behind his elbow swaying dangerously close to spilling all over his lap. "Well, I could tell you're a servant. The merchant's, I suppose. What's your name, love?"
Percy grimaced, almost as if he had forgotten the fact that he was posing as James' loyal servant, and the reminder of it had made him a bit sick. Still, he answered the question only a bit less enthusiastically than usual. "Percy Anthony Planthony at your service!" He chirped, and he began to reach up to his head to take off his hat in the respectable Frellensae manner, only to realize he didn't have a hat anymore, and he sulked into the back of the sofa. The sofa was, to be honest, less of a sofa and more of a giant marshmallow, therefore this sulking movement made the whole piece of furniture squish down to one side, causing Micha and James to nearly get swallowed up in it as well.
Kiato grinned. "Well, Percy Anthony Planthony, if you don't mind me offering, I would be willing to pay you much more per month than your current employer is even capable of offering. What do you say?"
James, who had chosen that moment as an opportune time to take a sip of his tea, nearly choked on the liquid, tears coming to his eyes for a second when the hot beverage spilled all over his arm as he coughed. "W...what?!"
Kiato held up a hand. "I hope you don't take this in the wrong way... of course I can tell you are dearly attached to you servant."
"In the wrong way?! In the wrong way?!" James sputtered. "I can say quite honestly I'm taking this in the exact right way! How dare you-"
"It was just an offer."
"It was derogatory!”
Kiato frowned, looking as if he were deep in thought for a moment. “Would you care to tell me exactly what you find derogatory about my statement?”
James scowled at the man, but didn’t say anything more. Kiato nodded as if he had, in fact, said something that had concluded the argument, and he turned back to Percy, who was growing quite uncomfortable.
“What do you say?” Kiato appealed.
Percy froze. He didn't want to offend of refuse the man, but he wasn't a servant. He didn't want to be a servant. Accepting the offer was not an option. "I..."
"What he means to say is that he absolutely does not want to work for you," James swooped in, and Kiato raised an eyebrow.
"You seem very confident about that."
"That's because I am."
Kiato raised the other eyebrow. He took a sip of his tea, using the ingestion of the beverage not as a refreshment but as an excuse to not have a witty reply coming out of his mouth right away. Finally, he put the tea back down, as it had emptied quite a while ago, and he had begun to feel quite stupid drinking air. "And I suppose you know exactly what your servant is thinking at all times and therefore are the best person to ask when there is a question of his choice?" He said, and James crossed his arms, turning to Percy. "Well, Perce, what's your answer?"
Percy began panicking once again, and he wrung his hands together. "Um... I'd rather just stay employed to James, thank you sir."
Kiato leaned back in his chair, putting a foot on his knee poshly. "Ah. I see. Well, no harm in asking, I suppose," he decided. "...But I can't help but notice, 'James' -as Percy called you- the fact that your servant is continually calling you by your first name. It can't be because he has no manners, for he has called me 'sir.' So you know what I think, 'James?'" He leaned forward again, his tea cup nearly falling to the floor. "...I think that Percy isn't really your servant. And I think you aren't really a merchant. I think you're all fakes."
Mecha made a move to stand up at that moment, but stopped herself as Feilin looked at her and shook his head slightly. She reluctantly stayed put, but tried not to be pulled back into the cushy depths of the sofa once again, just in case she would have to leap up quickly, either in defense, attack, or in flee she was uncertain. (Mecha had learned over the years that Feilin’s judgment was normally on the correct side of the scale, but when he was wrong, things usually ended up worsening to a huge extent. Lessons learned: trust Feilin and his judgment, but not completely.)
“And you know what I think?” Feilin replied in a reproachful tone, “I think you’re a spy. Hired by Levestar.”
Kiato laughed. “My dear friend, what in the world would make you think that?”
Feilin’s grip on the arms of the chair tightened. “How easily you seemed to figure everything out. You knew we were undercover, didn’t you? Before Percy even said a word. You seemed to know something was up the moment you opened the door. And nobody’s that quick.” Nobody but me, Feilin added quietly to himself.
Kiato crossed his arms. “Hm… well, if you think so… why don’t I tell you a little bit about your friends here…” he made a general gesture to Percy and James “…and then you can tell me again that nobody’s that quick, if you like. Because I promise you, I am very quick, if that’s the word you’re using for it.”
“Using for what?” Lesinthur asked, mostly regretting asking the question as Kiato turned and smirked at him.
“Using for genius,” he said, then took another sip of his tea –which no longer existed, but nobody but himself knew that, and it was simply for dramatic effect.
Feilin raised an eyebrow. “Alright then. Say whatever you think will convince me you didn’t get information from an enemy source. Convince us you really are a genius, as you said,” he baited, and Kiato grinned.
“Only if you all promise not to say a word as I am speaking. In fact, start not talking right now, just to be sure. Okay, so, where to start…
“The first thing I noticed was the mud on the sleeve of James’ –or ‘the merchant’s’- jacket. If he had bought it himself, he would have been much more cautious about not getting it dirty, for it looks like an expensive coat. So could it have been a gift? No, because when I asked him if he liked or had a cat, he said no, and there are just a few cat hairs clinging to the fabric of the shoulder. Someone rich enough to gift such an expensive coat would most definitely not own a cat, as pets of any kind are not allowed in any kingdom arias. So that means… you stole it. And your shoes don’t match the rest of your outfit, by the way. Any fashion-conscious gentleman of high society would have noticed that.”
James looked deeply offended at this, as he considered himself to be quite fashion conscious indeed, but didn’t say anything.
“Another thing: James and Percy noticed the painting on the wall before I turned the oil lamp on, even though it was quite dark in this room at the time. This points to the fact that the two of them are very used to seeing in the dark, which suggests that not too long ago, they used to reside in Under Frel, and had been for quite some time before coming up to the surface world again. That also explains James’ nervous tic of looking up to the ceiling every once in a while, as if to check if the ground above him isn’t caving in. Another thing I noticed about the two of them –if, in fact, I am only deducting facts about them, which I dearly hope is correct, for I am quite enjoying it- was that James seems quite attached to Percy, yet Percy seems to take James for granted. Usually, that is not normal in a master-servant relationship, quite often it is in fact the opposite. Anyway, even though Percy obviously takes James for granted, James didn’t seem at all worried that Percy would accept my offer of employment. So I figured that Percy was posing as your servant. But why would he do that? I wanted to figure this out. So I made my other… interests in Percy apparent, which, to my expectations, made James quite unhappy and maybe a little protective… so I entertained the idea that Percy was not only your servant but your lover, but I soon I decided that it was much more likely that he was posing as your servant because your relationship was, for reasons I didn’t know, prohibited. But…” he continued with a dramatic wave of his hand, “after further inspection, I realized that James was extremely surprised that I was apparently interested in Percy beyond employment, almost as if the notion had never occurred to him, which points to the fact that James finds Percy completely undesirable, and therefore Percy is only posing as his servant because he drew a short straw. Either that or James finds Percy desirable but never expected anyone else to, but that is unlikely because of a human trait called jealousy, which James proved he had lots of in his reaction to me saying that I could offer Percy a much better salary than himself. His jealousy to that, I realized, was not out of romantic love for his companion, but was possibly out of guilt. But guilt to what? That is the one thing I could not fully compute. Percy is obviously not more than five or so years younger than James, and Percy is, technically speaking or not, an adult. So it couldn’t have been guilt that consisted in any kind of neglect unless…” He turned to James and Percy –who were beginning to quite regret coming anywhere near here in the first place, much was the rest of the company- and narrowed his eyes in thought. “…unless there’s something not quite right about dear Percy… it wouldn’t be surprising, no-one nowadays is quite right. But there does seem to be something off about the darling, obvious or not. So…” Kiato stood up then, as if it were the finale to a great spectacle –which, everyone had to admit, it kind of was- and announced, “what is wrong with Percy Anthony Planthony is the only deduction I was unable to make! Do you still doubt my abilities and my word, or can you safely agree that I am, in fact, ‘quick?’”
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Fiona Ella
Feb 21, 2019
This is very intriguing! Your voice really comes through in this and it's funny and also intriguing. The characters here are really wonderfully strange. I like this.