Jun 22

Drain (My Truth)

To: __

You pierced, twisted my words, and formed it into an enraging monster.

To create my life into a living hell.

You fed me beliefs that you did those horrid things because of me,
and you told me exactly how. (without hesitation)
Like you've been waiting forever to make me aware of how "it was all my fault."

Piecing a scar into my heart. Setting my brain on fire.

Turning the people that you once used to get jealous of me hanging around, against me.

You sat and covered your arms with war,
but was that really because of me?

Are you sure the devil didn't whisper into your ears "to look and see what lies beneath the outter layer of your skin?"
Are you sure he wasn't the one who told you to take a peak?

If you claim that I do everything you never want me to do, why are you still on my case?
Why is it that you won't leave me alone if I've done such horrendous things in your sight?
I unfollow, I remove your number, I block, but you always find a way to plant yourself into my life again.

And when you come back you paint a guilt trip into my head leading for me to take you back in.

You told yourself that I never cared about you, and you told them that I've destroyed you.
You pierced me, set my conscience on fire, twisted my words, and fed them dreadful lies.
 but, if I didn't care...
 why was i still trying at that time?

  Over 4 1/2 months 
I carry this baggage of a "friendship" that's damaged my mental health so much, to the point where I always used to think to give up.
but I've dropped that baggage.

One could only take so much in a toxic "friendship" (especially when they feel like they can't get out of it!)
 that they'll..
                  1.become drained.
                                         2.give up.
                                                   3.not care anymore.

and thats what happened.

I've never put myself through so much disrespect,
that whole situation was minusing my values 
and teaching myself to let me feel this way, just for people.

I want to thank you for that big lesson of my life, but the end and time of this story is up.

                   Watering dead flowers doesn't make them come back to life.
                                 We've come to the end of this chapter,

and I'll be the one to close the book.

About the Author: shenneljolly
“I can shake off everything as I write; my sorrows disappear, my courage is reborn.”— Anne Frank