Sep 21

in the town i don't belong to anymore

we have Glover Day. i am sitting in a hard plastic chair listening to the only new young person who has moved here in my 19 years. the locals have aged in a way that breaks my trust in youth, my own and theirs. Kyle the new young person is playing guitar and wearing a snazzy jacket, and everyone loves him because he came instead of leaving.
sometimes i think about buying my mother's house so that she can run away from this town that is so static until the moment you leave it.
when i was young in this town everything was reliable. the cows gave birth at the same time every year and nobody dared die because they knew i was there to see it all.
now i left and came back and i find:
- my favorite horse dead and i don't know where to find her buried
- old ladies who had previously dyed hair are graying unabashedly
- Kyle the new guitar player from Kentucky - how did he settle on this particular town?
- a california girl who has touched the same southern man that my north-east hands have
- the general store doesn't carry candles anymore