"Sometimes I feel a little breathless."
Occasionally, when the sky
gives way to smoke I am: spread starfish
on my bed, fingers tapping,
circulating something I should've said or done in my head.
Is it always like this?
Must I always pretend not to breathe?
Last night I gave myself to the Road to Nowhere.
I flailed around my golden room — I let myself become warm with dancing.
Sometimes, when I'm stuck the best thing to do is manufacture freedom.
Sometimes, I feel like it will never come.
Today, I met a boy.
I wanted him to ask me my name.
I wanted him to look at me, really look –
and tell me what he saw.
When was the last time you did that for yourself?
When was the last time you didn't need anyone else to tell you who you are?
Occasionally, when the sky
gives way to smoke I am: spread starfish
on my bed, fingers tapping,
circulating something I should've said or done in my head.
Is it always like this?
Must I always pretend not to breathe?
Last night I gave myself to the Road to Nowhere.
I flailed around my golden room — I let myself become warm with dancing.
Sometimes, when I'm stuck the best thing to do is manufacture freedom.
Sometimes, I feel like it will never come.
Today, I met a boy.
I wanted him to ask me my name.
I wanted him to look at me, really look –
and tell me what he saw.
When was the last time you did that for yourself?
When was the last time you didn't need anyone else to tell you who you are?
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amaryllis
Sep 18, 2020
I relate so hard to this, my gosh. Especially the second and second to last stanzas. I spend way to much time wondering what people think, and it’s never really occurred to me I shouldn’t have to be. Thank you.