Feb 23

Ramblings

This isn't going to be very good. This is just something I need to get out, because if I can't be honest about myself in writing then I don't know who I am.
I don't know who I am.
I've lost myself. If you've read what I've previously written, you'll know that my heart was broken a while ago. Now I don't know who to be, what I'm supposed to do. She took that from me too. When I was with her I was the person she wanted me to be, but now... now I don't have to pretend like that anymore, and I need to find myself again.
I don't have many memories up until about two years ago. The memories I do have are fragmented and in the wrong order, and I don't feel like they belong to me. I feel like an impostor in my own life, like I have to be the girl my family knows because that's who they expect me to be but I'm not her. I'm not me. I'm not anyone.
So it's fairly safe to say that I'm in a bit of a pickle. I feel so new, like this version of me was born only a few months ago, and who I was before is dead and not part of me at all anymore. I feel like I'm lying to my family. I just want everything to be normal again