Nov 20
Emily Van Dyke's picture

The Sun and the Moon

The sun and the moon

It all started with my petite young body, and hair that was brimming with anxiety. My description sided with eyes engulfing the world of exception. I was lost in my journey of repeating life, my life has been flawed, to say the least. I was in a room of people, and yet I felt so individualized. I only really understood negative feelings, feeling like this stays longer than peaceful feelings anyways. everything seems so cloudy in my brain, how could I possibly focus on school. I didn’t know that I wasn’t broken. My brain was just healing, but even if you were to tell me, I would have blamed myself. The sun came out, it came pouring right through the door. Hollering, with a magnificently peaceful smile. I started to feel the warmth of love pouring into my heart, the sun didn’t care for the darkness in the room, but only cared about rewriting it with the most heart-stirring potential of change. My heart engulfed itself into the moon. Even just a teacher, she was a guide.  I rotated around the engaging enchantment of structure she housed. The moon didn’t think she deserved this loving light that the sun possessed but the sun didn’t care. She could sense that my heart was still wandering to find love for myself, and she wanted to help me find it. So we started on this seemingly never ending journey. We first looked high in the clouds and admired as they swirl and twist to create portraits of all that it could interpret. We looked low, deep into the core of earth’s heart, feeling the hot fire purify my bones, engulfing my body and rebirthing me into a new soul. The sun and I searched together for years, each day was a lesson on release, as for the more I learned the more I knew that I wasn’t alone, that what I was as a person wasn’t wrong, it was just manipulated, and that I would be okay. The sun knew me, she knew that my heart was never lost, but it was with me the whole time, I was just scared to let the light of the world see it, as it is so broken it could not handle the rough hands of a person. She looked at me with all of the patience in the world, and told me with no words, that she was never to leave. She said as she wrote her message with the stars, as the sun and moon we are to give our heart out to all before we know just who deserves it. She told me that the people that had my heart when I was young, didn’t see the importance of the moon so they took advantage. She told me that I was perfect the way I was and that my heart was not broken, just simply unique, but that it was up to us to heal it. The more she spoke to me about how the world is so big and someone is bound to get a life that doesn’t damage but instead strengthens, the more I felt how much the sun cared for me and my journey. It was at that moment that the stars, the high skies, the low core, the heart in me, and the heart in the sun, started to sing. It was a beautiful melody, cleaning all my wounds, restoring my brokenness, and the sun and I looked at each other. I knew it was her that showed me what the earth looked like without pain, and without heartache. The universe gave me but one thing in that moment, as asked by the sun; An empty piece of paper. The sun knew what it was, and I was still learning. She told me, in order to heal, you must find what brings you the most love and what heals your own heart. So we wrote, we sat with the universe and the stars for years. In that time the sun educated me as the moon, on what this lovely thing of writing was, we wrote and sat together, until the dark complexion shadowed over me, and the deep loveless groves in my body, filled with light. It was the fire that empowered my souls that showered through my skin and bright love that shattered my old body and I emerged into a new loving light. I became my sun. I was hesitant with a first step of new growth and strength so I looked behind me at the beautiful sun who sat with me, showed me my worth, and educated me on love, and she said “I knew you could do it, kitten”.