Goodbye Dinos

Some 65 million years ago, dinosaurs found themselves in the direct path of a giant asteroid. Shortly after this unfortunate realization dinos were no more. But, in that same moment, new life evolved. Trapped inside the asteroid had been small traces of alien genetics. When the asteroid hit, these traces scattered and flew into the ground, where they became plants and started to thrive. Pretty soon, the alien plants realized they needed to grow legs, and arms, and mouths… In other words, evolve in any way possible. So, they began to absorb leftover genetics from the dinosaur accident previously explained. When they grew big enough, they pulled their plant stems out of the ground, (don’t worry, this was an entirely painless process) and began to live as humans with tails. Over time, the tails got smaller and smaller, and finally went fully away. Thousands of years later, they were officially humans. But, of course, since no one wanted to say we evolved from aliens, someone decided to say we evolved from monkeys, because somehow that’s a better species to have evolved from than aliens. So, next time someone asks you if you believe in aliens, you can say yes, because we’re all evolved from them.