QueenBee

QueenBee

VT

14 years old

Posts

  • Story Mountain

    I guess I've been thinking

    The story mountain we made

    And the characters didn't even get their lives told

    Because ours crashed and burned before we could handle it

  • I Won't

    Nope

    I'm not going back to school.

    I'm going to ignore the back-to-school ads

    And shopping trips

    The packing

    The new outfits

    The brand-new pencils

    I won't do it

  • Glimpses

    Noise

    Warming up

    Keys

    Fingerings

    Chatter

    Laughter

    The chorale

    Stopping

    Starting

    "Again"

    "I know you can do better than that"

    Serious but

    You also love it

  • Cornered

    Cornered

    I put my hands up

    Like you taught me

    Only now

    You're the one attacking

    "Helping" because

    You "just want me to feel better"

    And I braced for impact

  • Distracted and angry

    I'm distracted.

    Why did I let myself become so reliant

    Dependent

    So stupid

    Ugh I'm so mad.

    So mad.

    I let myself become distracted by silly things I could want

    I let myself want them

  • Beauty

    Beauty is

    Not hiding being a thick mask

    A thick layer that is not you.

    Beauty is

    Not wanting to be someone's doll

    Someone's plaything

    We are not here for decoration.

    Beauty is knowing what you want

Loves

  • sweet/heart

    you remind me of ๐•”๐•’๐•Ÿ๐••๐•ช decay. in a pop-up cartoon store, flies buzzing around your flushed eyeballs.

    ๐’๐’—๐’†๐’“๐’†๐’™๐‘จ๐‘ฎ๐‘ฎ๐’†๐’“๐‘จ๐’•๐’†๐’… and with hearts still in your eyes. tell me whether it hurt when they loved you.

  • Drowning in the unknown

    I am tormented by slight movements

    even silence is hurting me

    reality seems to be strobing

    or something like it -

    I've yet to learn how to explain these moments to others,

    even myself.

    It's not normal,

  • Anticipation

    This is the worst kind of anticipation

    this anticipation isn't just fear of what is to come

    it's laced around the edges with knowledge of how it went last time

    of how a repeat of last year is most likely inevitable.