This reminds me of the poem you choose to memorize, about cooking the truth. Did you take inspiration from it? I love how you made it into a bit of a cooking recipe. The little side notes just make it so fun and cute. It kind of sounds like something a little kid would make for their parents and serve at their outdoor restaurant with little mud cakes. I love that it's both silly but also so precise, “stir it four times counter clockwise”. I also really enjoy your formatting. The one end line about it tasting like strawberry lemonade is very nice. I think this poem is the cure for boredom.
I love the whole "I hate you, I love you" aspect of this story. It's a lot of fun to read :)
Reply to: Shabbat candlesWednesday, October 20, 2021 - 8:54am
Comment Author: roxyforthewin
this evokes the feeling of lighting Shabbat candles so well. I am at boarding school and there are no other Jewish kids here. This poem makes me miss Shabbat with my family! Great job.
Thank you so much, Susan! I'm so happy you like it, I think it's my best writing yet. I was inspired by Saturday with the wind blowing the leaves across my yard, where I was sitting with my dog in the sun. It was just so peaceful, yet chaotic at the same time. Like how the gray clouds were mixed in with the fluffy white ones and the sun beating down on them. And with the wind and the leaves creating mini tornadoes. It was beautiful :)
I love this so much! It makes me think of two young people falling in love, or perhaps they already are. Makes me think of my SO. PLease keep writing, Absolutely beautiful!
Reply to: Apple orchard Monday, October 18, 2021 - 12:08am
Comment Author: liebeslied
for some reason these pictures made me smile :) the orchard looks so beautiful!
Reply to: Red WineMonday, October 18, 2021 - 12:05am
Comment Author: liebeslied
I loved reading this! especially the imagery of "Sliding doors, midnight strolls, place your bets" and the line "Stones unturned let your feelings burn"
Reply to: Hidden in TuneSunday, October 17, 2021 - 11:13am
Comment Author: Lizzy_Rights
I agree with Deja Vu and Cloud 9, though I don't know Arcade. It's hard because I feel like I recognize a lot of the phrases, but can't put a name to it. Though I love how you used the challenge and made it your own, and this poem is absolutely beautiful, great work!!
This poem has such a beautiful rhythm! I love the sense that it is unending, one sentence flowing into the next. I would love to hear these words set to music!
Reply to: My EyesSaturday, October 16, 2021 - 8:47pm
Comment Author: Flowergirl12300
Amazing!
Reply to: My EyesSaturday, October 16, 2021 - 8:37pm
Comment Author: Scarry Night
Thank you so much!
Reply to: all our crimesSaturday, October 16, 2021 - 6:49pm
Comment Author: ivyparks
thank you :)))
Reply to: Fall FoliageSaturday, October 16, 2021 - 5:39pm
Comment Author: Dancer
Hi Greybean!
I love fall too! Where in live (in So. Burlington, VT), there's sadly not quite enough trees for it to look like this. These photos are from Sugarbush, where my family and I took a day trip to. I'm so happy you like them :)
Reply to: My EyesSaturday, October 16, 2021 - 4:16pm
Comment Author: Lizzy_Rights
I went through that a lot with my family last year with the Presidential Campaign. And with the vaccines, and mask wearing, and a lot of other stuff. But I'm happy that you've found you're voice, or trying too. :)
Reply to: Snow whiteSaturday, October 16, 2021 - 3:21pm
Comment Author: Lizzy_Rights
I love the twisted fairy-tale aspect of this, and the feminism in the last line, "Waiting for someone to save her when she just wanted to save Herself"
THIS.IS.FANTASTIC. Wooow, I love it so much! Its so fun and entertaining, not to mention true! "Who knew that the line between life and death/could be as small as a piece of fabric". Absolute perfection
Reply to: Fall FoliageSaturday, October 16, 2021 - 12:44pm
Comment Author: GreyBean
I wish trees would look like this where I live! Fall's one of my favorite seasons (mostly because it's not as hot as spring or summer) and I always love seeing photos of orange trees! Thanks for sharing!! :)
Awww yay that makes me so happy (:
I am another young teenage girl with autism, and I have had the exact same expirience! I love they way you put it words!
This reminds me of the poem you choose to memorize, about cooking the truth. Did you take inspiration from it? I love how you made it into a bit of a cooking recipe. The little side notes just make it so fun and cute. It kind of sounds like something a little kid would make for their parents and serve at their outdoor restaurant with little mud cakes. I love that it's both silly but also so precise, “stir it four times counter clockwise”. I also really enjoy your formatting. The one end line about it tasting like strawberry lemonade is very nice. I think this poem is the cure for boredom.
Thank you so much!
Lovely!
I love the whole "I hate you, I love you" aspect of this story. It's a lot of fun to read :)
this evokes the feeling of lighting Shabbat candles so well. I am at boarding school and there are no other Jewish kids here. This poem makes me miss Shabbat with my family! Great job.
Thank you so much, Susan! I'm so happy you like it, I think it's my best writing yet. I was inspired by Saturday with the wind blowing the leaves across my yard, where I was sitting with my dog in the sun. It was just so peaceful, yet chaotic at the same time. Like how the gray clouds were mixed in with the fluffy white ones and the sun beating down on them. And with the wind and the leaves creating mini tornadoes. It was beautiful :)
I love this so much! It makes me think of two young people falling in love, or perhaps they already are. Makes me think of my SO. PLease keep writing, Absolutely beautiful!
for some reason these pictures made me smile :) the orchard looks so beautiful!
I loved reading this! especially the imagery of "Sliding doors, midnight strolls, place your bets" and the line "Stones unturned let your feelings burn"
I agree with Deja Vu and Cloud 9, though I don't know Arcade. It's hard because I feel like I recognize a lot of the phrases, but can't put a name to it. Though I love how you used the challenge and made it your own, and this poem is absolutely beautiful, great work!!
This poem has such a beautiful rhythm! I love the sense that it is unending, one sentence flowing into the next. I would love to hear these words set to music!
Amazing!
Thank you so much!
thank you :)))
Hi Greybean!
I love fall too! Where in live (in So. Burlington, VT), there's sadly not quite enough trees for it to look like this. These photos are from Sugarbush, where my family and I took a day trip to. I'm so happy you like them :)
I went through that a lot with my family last year with the Presidential Campaign. And with the vaccines, and mask wearing, and a lot of other stuff. But I'm happy that you've found you're voice, or trying too. :)
I love the twisted fairy-tale aspect of this, and the feminism in the last line, "Waiting for someone to save her when she just wanted to save Herself"
(And just for the record, I found the pictures on google and I don't claim them :)
THIS.IS.FANTASTIC. Wooow, I love it so much! Its so fun and entertaining, not to mention true! "Who knew that the line between life and death/could be as small as a piece of fabric". Absolute perfection
I wish trees would look like this where I live! Fall's one of my favorite seasons (mostly because it's not as hot as spring or summer) and I always love seeing photos of orange trees! Thanks for sharing!! :)
beautiful.
Ooh I love the line "Secrets slipping through our cigarette stained teeth"
Thank you ❤️