Joyfulness by Brandon Rivera

Today I aimed to choose joyfulness.

I slept in an extra hour, pulled the death out my face, and put on what I thought was special.

I was ecstatic, laughing and giggling,

feeling the warmth of the sun dance on my skin like dew drops. 

Soon, my happiness fell short-

Stamped out by thoughtless words, my cheerfulness fragile and frangible.

So easily hurled into my deepest and scariest corners,

I'm suffocated by the demons that haunt my mind.

Encased by a tomb of my worst thoughts, screaming from lack of oxygen,

I yell for help.

Only, I'm met with disdain and disrespect from my peers,

Castigated for my flaws and vulgar language,

My call for help is disregarded.

They label and classify me like an equation they can solve,

Turning my worries into problems and solutions,

I remain unheard and not seen, tucked into a small fragment of their minds.

Only to be recognized when my stressors are so apparent, 

I create trouble outwardly.

Clawed from the depths of my soul,

The deepest waters rise to shore, and crash like a tsunami,

Obliterating anything it crosses paths with.

Burning, flaring, 

Harsh and unforgiving,

it drowns me.