Perfection

Every day I face my reflection 
and I feel a kind of revulsion
I pick out the imperfections
and make them all that I see
until what I see in the mirror
is a whole different picture
I need you to understand
I don't know what I look like
because the mirror is a lie
and my own eyes deceive me
and my vision is so warped
and I don't know what's real anymore
And I feel so downtrodden
when I see the magazines
that create a false perfection 
using lenses and angles
and a careful editing tool
They make it look so easy
when it's really impossible
to fit the standards they create
So I compare myself to models
which really isn't fair
and it leaves me in a state
of uttermost despair
And between my own insecurity
and society's guidelines
I've become my own worst bully
and I'm hurting my heart
"Why can't you be more pretty?"
I ask myself in vain
but the only answer that I get
is a whimper of distress
I feel so unhappy 
and the only way to fix it
is to achieve the impossible
And now I'm officially falling apart
I tear myself to bits
ripping skin from my bones
to achieve happiness 
and I feel so isolated in this war 
that's fought against myself
and it feels like there's no solution
How can you change your perspective?
Especially when you're looking at yourself
seeing the flaws that others don't 
but you see them every time
and then you try to fix them
but there is no way to succeed
and you end up looking worse 
and then you feel worse 
Now I am nothing 
but a bag of skin and bone
and I'm dying because I'm trying
to become the unachievable
and I'm not the only one...








 

 

Crescent_Moon

VT

19 years old