No matter where I go,
What I do,
My past follows me.
Lurking in the shadows,
Waiting for the perfect time,
To pounce.
Fear petrifies me,
And I am caught between,
The past and the present.
A voice tells me that the past will just keep repeating itself
Another tells me that I need to keep going and stop looking back,
But I can follow either.
I am caught between my emotions,
Stuck in the past, but trying to look forward,
Trying and failing to see the light.
What I do,
My past follows me.
Lurking in the shadows,
Waiting for the perfect time,
To pounce.
Fear petrifies me,
And I am caught between,
The past and the present.
A voice tells me that the past will just keep repeating itself
Another tells me that I need to keep going and stop looking back,
But I can follow either.
I am caught between my emotions,
Stuck in the past, but trying to look forward,
Trying and failing to see the light.
- Maya Lynn's blog
- Sprout
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Hazel.C.
Jan 02, 2018
I love the ideas of being “caught between the past and present” and “caught between emotions”. I think you could enhance this piece by describing these ideas further: What happens to you, emotionally and mentally, when you are caught between past and present? Maybe you could add some visual/sensory description that shows how your emotions are reflected physically.
Maybe you could also specify how the past pounces; in memories? Regrets? Hesitation? How does that challenge your ability to live in the present?
There is some great expression of emotion in this piece, my suggestions as to the why and how will just help the reader relate more closely. Hope that’s helpful,
~Hazel
~Hazel