Oct 19
earleyg's picture

Secrets

Everyone has secrets. And sometimes those secrets need to come out. But then, it's not really a secret if you tell someone, is it? Or is it a secret so long as a specific person or number of people stay in the dark? I'm known to be someone who everyone tells me their secrets, though I have none of my own because I'm not a very secretive person, although sometimes I wish I was. I got nothing to hide, but you, you have vents and questions and decisions to make that you need to make on your own in the end, but need or want to share your inner struggle with someone. Of course, that means swearing me to secrecy and never telling another soul. And I do a pretty damn good job, but listen, I'm so full of other people's secrets, why? Why can't I say, 'no, go talk to someone else about your problem, I've got my own life to live?' Why can't I turn my friends away when they need me for such a personal reason? It's their decision, it's their problem. But it isn't, you get me involved, but ask me to stay out of it, what? I can't do that! You dragged me into it, and me being a good friend will of course I'll help, but then you also ask me to not do anything. And of course, I won't, because I'm so loyal that I'd rather struggle under a burdon than let you struggle alone, or at all, but it takes a toll on me after a while. I won't tell another soul the secret you told me because you entrusted me with words that are "dangerous" to you at this moment in time and that letting someone else know could tarnish your reputation, your ego, or something else. But please, relieve me of this pressure to keep my mouth shut. I would never tell someone a secret to put them under the pressure of having to be quiet, which is probably why I'm not secretive in general. But honestly, these secrets may be buried for now, and they may be for a long long time later, but please, relieve me of this pressure.