Oct 19

Just Breathe

   Breathe.

    Keep your head down.

    Eyes steadily on the ground.

    Don't look at them.

    Pace yourself.

    They don't know you.

    They don't accept you.

    I walk through the crowd repeating those words through my mind. Let them think your a creature, a monster even. They don't have your sharp horns, the ones that curl back. They don't have the crimson eye that represents the fire burning in your soul. They don't understand the frozen eye relishing the ice through your veins. They are human, and you are not. Some fear you and some worship you.

They fear me. I've heard the rumors. Some say that I have frozen over a thousand people, hiding their bodys in an underground cavern. It's not true. Some people say I work for the devil, burning people alive for the sins they build up and now i'm here working for him on the surface. Not true. The people who worship me say that I am the only forbidden child of the fire god Hephaestus and the ice god Khione. Not true. What is true, I don't know. How would I know.

The first thing I remember was an old woman. The woman was fragile and had to rely on a kane to make it by. She always sipped tea while she read to me by the fire. She would brush my silver hair, always making remarks about children like me.

“Young Admani-Niamh you are just like the other children I used to hold. I remember young Lumi, she held ice like you! She was always so stubborn and when she didn't get her way she would freeze me!” The old woman would laugh and start to braid my long locks. “Oh and then Agni! Always complaining when Lumi froze me all up! He would take hours using as little of his gift as possible so he wouldn't burn me, thawing all of the ice Lumi put me in. Aww I miss those two, they were not siblings but they always acted like em.” She would sigh tying the black ribbon at the end of my braid.

    “Where did I come from?” I would alway ask that when she brought up Lumi and Agni. I didn't necessarily know if they were my parents or not but I always hoped.

    “Im sorry Admani-Niamh, they couldn't possibly be your parents. Lumi got herself in trouble with the villagers and they tore her to shreds with the pitchforks that they used for the hay. Agni was so heartbroken over her death, he nearly wiped out the village. Wherever you go there don't ever look them in they eye. I want you to say these words

   Breathe.

   Keep your head down.

    Eyes steadily on the ground.

    Don't look at them.

    Pace yourself.

    They don't know you.

    They don't accept you.” The woman lifted her gaze to the sunny window. She used her free hand to shade her eyes, as the other one was busy clutching to her kane beside the chair in which she sat. “Admani-Niamh, promise me you wont make the mistakes they did. Now they are gone, and now i'm all alone.” The woman had a saddened glaze over her eyes. Her hazel eyes now almost grey. Tears welled up, swaddling the iris’s to perfectly.

    “Please don't cry! I'll stay I promise” Even though at the time I was three, I kept that promise until the woman died.

    Now as I finally pass through the town, I head to the graveyard that held her body. I look for a while and end up finding her grave. The mossed over stone cross and stone angles around it was a dead giveaway. “Mother Abra, its been awhile. If you were wondering, the kitten we got a few years ago is all grown up now. The house is a little messy, but no one could even match to how perfect it was when you were around. Remember Agni and Lumi? How are they? It's getting late mother.” I used my hand to craft a perfect ice rose, Petal by petal, leaf by leaf. It was almost too perfect. “I hope you like this rose mother!” I rested the flower on her bed. “I brought you a candle! Its vanilla lavender, your favorite….” I start to mumble and warm tears run down my cheeks. “Back to the town I go, See you later mom…”

   Breathe.

   Keep your head down.

    Eyes steadily on the ground.

    Don't look at them.

    Pace yourself.

    They don't know you.

    They don't accept you.