IceGalaxy

how do you write a story
when the words just aren't there
or they're out of reach
floating above your head-
fingers skimming the bottom of them
every time you try to jump back in control-
but they tease you

do you ever get the feeling
where your body goes completely still
your mind completely silent
nothing feels quite right –
similar to dysphoria but in a way more intense
and you just sit or stand

i talked to someone today
i talked to a man in canada over a chatroom
he didn't say much
we chatted back and forth nonverbally
he asked me
did a cripple deserve love

i said yes
because everyone does

he asked me why

when i was seven
i still believed in fairy tales
i still wanted to wear a crown
be a princess
have someone look up to me & say
i am beautiful; i am smart
i am everything everyone wants to be:
perfect

You do not have a right
to anything on this flesh-colored landscape
of sheer beauty 
that is my body.
I have worked so hard
to learn to love myself
to learn how to be okay with my body