Apart

I sit here and stare

Stare at the window's reflection on the floor

The snow drifting down

The grey outside

I notice every little detail

I remember when a phone wasn't important to me

When all I wanted to do was play outside in the grass

Watch as the clouds wisped by in the sky

too fat

too skinny

eating too much

eating too little

not good enough

too self confident

around and around it goes

my mind can't stop 

won't stop

if I tell myself this