childhood

it was easier
when we were kids
dealing with scabbed knees
instead of scarred wrists
eating paste instead of 
inhaling it 
writing with pens instead of 
pretending to be normal and 
vaping with fake ones

it was easier 
when we were kids
we didn't care about politics
or global warming
or gun violence
or the future;
we thought our lives would
forever be solidified in 
sticky summer sweat and
graham cracker crumbs
drenched in apple juice
stuck to sand-covered fingers
from the hours we spent in the sandbox
forming worlds in which we could pretend-
who would've thought 
we'd want to escape reality 
so much more 
years later?

it was easier
when we were kids
not a care in the world because
the world didn't care for us
we didn't obsess over numbers on our Instagram posts
we didn't obsess over texts from people we hated
we didn't obsess over the numbers on the scale
we lived only in the moment for ourselves
whereas now
we live in the past
where all our mistakes welcome us and say
"this is where you belong
with us,
your failures.
you deserve this

did you really think
childhood would last forever?"