Don't I?

I turn away from them and gaze out the window.

The clouds gather in large gray clumps across the sky.

Painting everything below them in shades of gray.

My mind wanders to the only place I don’t ever want to go again.

Every second of every day, all I can think about is what I must do.

What I am really here for.

It weighs on me, wreaking havoc in my brain.

All I want is just one day, when I don’t have to think about my actions.

I don’t have to think about working.

What I have to do.

But I have to do it...

Don’t I?