magnolias in may

For the longest time

I have thought magnolias were overrated,

But maybe I had thought that because I had never seen them

Now, they are my favorite flowers

And they are my favorite, they remind me of you

I can't quite explain it,

Everything is so new,

But maybe magnolias remind me of you

because they remind me of beginnings

Fresh love, picked from the garden of my heart

and I can't stop using sappy, stupid words

but everything reminds me of you now

in a simple way

I am not overcome with emotion and grief,

more of a happy calm

And some say that you will find the person who ignites the flame in you,

and another that keeps the flame burning.

I don't think of it as a flame, 

but more of a tree

a magnolia tree

and if you don't nourish and care for the tree

If you don't shower it with enough love and sunlight, 

Don't forget water,

a key thing for life.

What I'm trying to say is that if you don't supervise and support the tree,

It will wilt and fall 

And sometimes that plant won't grow back.

Someone, a part of my past,

Planted the magnolia tree that resides in my heart

And the world fought against my ribs, trying to kill the tree 

And he almost let it die.

He was the wind and the clouds for me

A part of my lie I won't ever get back

It was always so thrilling, liking him

Because I never knew if he was going to like me back 

Or tell me to go away.

But I am so much happier, and my magnolia tree

I think of it as magnolias in May

Thriving and happy

with you.

warm, not exciting

the buzz of liking someone is still there

but now it makes me feel safe

not like i'm on the run

and i wonder what it would be like, 

holding your hand

and that is all i want right now

but i'm scared to ask 

because what if that isn't what you want 

and i just want to be what you want

so i stand here,

safe,

but planning my next move.

i don't want to ruin 

my sweet magnolia tree.