unsent messages (her side)

11:00 PM:  "I know its late but I cant sleep. How have you been? I've been thinking about you."
Delete

11:21 PM: "I saw someone in the hallway today wearing that exact same beat-up pair of Vans you have. I almost ran up and grabbed their arm before I realized their hair was too light and they didn't walk like you do. My heart did this stupid, hopeful jump for a person who wasn't even there."
Delete

11:45 PM:"I found that half-empty bag of Sour Patch Kids in my desk drawer—the ones you bought me because I was stressed about the Algebra quiz. I can't bring myself to eat them, but I can't throw them away either. It feels like if I toss the trash, I’m finally tossing 'us' into the bin, too. I’m literally haunted by a bag of candy. I think something is wrong with me"
Delete.

12:08 AM: "I saw you laughing with your friends in the hall. You were wearing your blue shirt I always liked. "
Delete.

12:40 AM: "I saw you with that new girl. It felt like someone reached into my chest and squeezed. Does she know you hate the crusts on your sandwiches? Does she know you only act tough when your friends are around? I hate that I’m the one who knows you best, but she’s the one who gets to hold your hand."
Delete.

1:09 AM:"I don't know how to stop. Every song on the radio is about you. Every time my phone buzzes, my heart does this stupid jump because I still hope it's you. I think I’m still in love with you, and it’s the loneliest feeling in the world."
Delete.

1:09 AM: "Please just text me. Anything.  Just let me know I’m still somewhere in your head, because you’re the only thing in mine." 
Delete.

1:30 AM: "I'm sorry I can't let go. I'm sorry I'm too much sometimes, and I'm sorry that I wasn't what you needed." 
Delete.

2:10 AM:  "I'm sorry it's late but can we talk?..." 
Delete.