waiting

do not talk to me
it just makes it feel
worse

don't look at me, 
you know how much
it hurts

i am sitting alone
in my science classroom,
doing my work
because i couldn't bring
myself to stand
out there with everyone,
especially you.

you made it sound
so unimportant, a quick
"not anymore" and then you
walked right out.

so why are you standing
in front of me now,
with no excuse for your
unwanted presence?

don't you get it?
don't you see?
i am always waiting for you,
and yet you always 
disappoint me.

you always leave me 
hanging on your last word,
make me dizzy with your
harsh gaze, because when
i let you into my life,
you locked me out.

so go talk to her.
go look at her.
go bother someone else.
because i am tired
of waiting for you
to finally realize that
i thought that you
really cared.