Who I am

Shyness...It has always lurked around me. Surrounding me throughout my entire life. It had been there through the worst and best times. I’d always hoped it would go away but it never seemed to fade. It attracted unwanted behavior sometimes. Especially in middle school. In middle school when I was shorter than everyone and then picked on and I didn’t have the courage to speak up. But I knew what they said wasn’t true so I ignored them. High school was a little better but I ended up being the kid that sits alone and does school work during lunch. 

    And then college. College was the best out of all of the school years. I had friends who were just like me. Quiet, shy, and kept to themselves. And the best part was, they were all writers like me. We did everything together. We wrote together, ate lunch together, had classes together. It was all perfect until it wasn’t. It was our third year of college and they had started hanging out with the more popular people in our clases. They came out of their shyness and started to be like everyone else. They began ditching me to hang out with other girls. I tried to be happy for them but on the inside I was hurt. 

    It wasn’t until one day when I was walking outside on a late October evening. It was one of the nights where the air smelled sweet and the wind blew gently. I took a deep breath and inhaled the sweetness of the night air. It was at that moment where I knew I didn’t care what anyone thought of me. I didn’t care that people didn’t want to hang out with me because I was shy. I loved being shy. It was who I am. And I knew that one day I was going to find that friend who would accept me for who I am and be there no matter what.