As soon as
I sense the slightest tinge
Of anger
I
Run from myself
Nononono
You know what happens when you get mad
Just play
And so I play and play
Sometimes it helps
It distracts
But when there's a black hole in you
Does anything truly fix it?
Does the anger ever go away?
I've been angry my whole life
I pick fights because I need to
I'm out of ideas
Out of things to keep cool
Done with these people
Done with all of this
I'm so angry
All the time
What's wrong with me?
Just hear those sleigh bells jingling, ring tingle tingling too
F F F F F G F-D Bb C D C-A G F-
imitating the human voice with instruments
percussion back there repeatedly hitting the sleigh bells
I showed my grandmother my keyboard
she took six years' of lessons when she was younger.
Her fingers found the keys -
she could still read -
just enough
just a little.
I pulled out my flute-piano duet book
You cared;
I tried to.
You did;
I thought I did.
I wanted so badly
to be a character in my books
and to feel longing
to feel needing
to feel love and to
be loved
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