QueenBee

I wish I could be you.

Running to your room

Plugging your ears

Whenever there's a scary part of a movie

And coming back out in time

To see the happy ending -

Closing your eyes

Covering your face

This man

With a family who loves him

But can't help him

Because he needs to help himself first

This man

Drunk on hatred for himself

For this world

"Hopeless", they all say

With their eyes

I am grateful.

Grateful that three no-longer-kids,
Grown-up,

Jobs-and-girlfriends-and-college boys

Are there for me

Have my back

Even though we haven’t talked for a while

Even though we live hours away

Every time I think I didn’t care

Every time I think you did nothing to me

But I can feel you

Creeping around who I’ve become

In my relationships

Beyond you -

I didn’t know how to do this,

Here, for the first time in years

With family I haven’t known

But still, family.

And I like it here.

The first vacation

I’ve actually enjoyed

So far away from my own home

Which usually I hate

I'm not going to lie,

I don't care -

I never really did.

I didn't last year

And I still don't.

But.

It does give me that

Teeny

Tiny

Itty

Bitty

Little

Bit of