A childhood obsession, sure.
That's how it started.
But it's all I am -
It's who I am -
It's the deepest
Truest
Version of myself I could possibly be.
The notebook.
Stats and tracking
Sketches and notes and oh-so-precise nothings
That are everything.
I am bored so I map.
I map and I track
And I think and I plan
So absorbed in this world
Not reality
This world
My home
I fixate on this when the real world's too real
Because I have a team here
I am in control here
I am being productive here
Even if
To you
It's a childish fantasy world
I should have long outgrown
It's not
It's me
It's what keeps me me
What keeps me sane
All the data, all the charts
The not-so-fictional world I love
I have trained myself
Year after year
Phase after phase
So I can come up with any information
All the information
All the tidbits and facts and tiny little details and measurements
I have stacked in my brain
I am the best
The best at this world you can't see
The best at this world I've always believed
I am the best
At my childhood obsession
Because it's real to me, okay?
It's real.
And I will never be too old for it.
Comments
Log in or register to post comments.